Taste Me

8.

The next afternoon, I dreamily think about Rocco during the entire train ride into work. I'm actually fucking looking forward to going to that hellhole with excitement for once.

I don't think that's ever happened before, and it's strange to me to not feel complete contempt for everything that is involved with having to be a server at the restaurant.

Now that I know Rocco intimately, and I'm able to view him as the sweet and charming guy he really is, I don't have to dread walking through the door anymore.

When I clock in, I notice that Rocco is not in the back of the kitchen like normal. There's a new chef and given by the fact that he's belting out orders, I take that to mean he's in charge.

"Hey," I grab the elbow of my coworker Sabrina, even though she and I aren't particularly close friends or even acquaintances for that matter.

"What?" She shoves off me and looks at me like I'm crazy, although she doesn't immediately walk away either.

"Who is that guy?" I whisper and point to the man in the chef suit I don't recognize.

"The new executive chef," Sabrina rolls her eyes and walks away as if I'm fucking dense.

"Where is Rocco?" I call out to her.

She spins around and smirks at me. "Shouldn't you know?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" I shake my head in denial, although my crimson cheeks are probably giving me away.

Sabrina ignores me. "Rocco quit last night," she says with a menacing tone and spins around on her head to bounce her way back down the hallway in self-satisfaction.

The walls close in on me and I sink into the floor. My head spins and my vision blurs as my eyes become cloudy with a dizzy feeling.

Rocco quit? Is someone playing a cruel trick on me?

A million questions race through my brain, but I have no answers to any of them.

Then it dawns on me. I haven't heard from him after he left my house the other night. He has not called me, and I can't reach out to him because I never got his number, he never gave it to me.

Now the self-doubt and second-guessing begin in my mind, wreaking ultimate havoc. He probably never gave me his number because he doesn't want me to actually call him.

How stupid am I to actually believe that a hot guy like Rocco is sincere?

My organs are crushing and collapsing in on themselves. I'm so hurt, that I can't breathe. Why is Rocco doing this to me?

I run to the bathroom and slam the stall door shut, not even fucking caring if I have to get to work out there because my shift is starting. It's not like Jana is ever going to give me a fucking decent table or anything so why bother?

Especially if Rocco is gone, what's the fucking point of working here anymore?

I compose myself after a minute or two and walk to the mirror by the sinks, examining my pathetic reflection. I look tired and depressed when only a few short minutes ago I was on top of the world dreaming of a budding relationship with Rocco.

This just doesn't make any fucking sense at all. Rocco wants to be with me, he told me repeatedly at my house.

He even went as far as to tell me I'm the perfect woman because I'm sexy and I can cook. Why would he lead me on like this if he doesn't genuinely care for me?

The whole situation is completely fucked up, and my emotions are scattering all over the place.

"What's wrong with you?" I hear Jana's voice snarl behind me.