It's Me

Chapter 14

Tobin's POV

I don't know why, but I haven't been able to get Chris out of my mind. I mean, we room together, and we've been hanging out a lot, but even when we're not, she's all I can think of. I haven't been this crazy over someone since...

Alex.

In fact, I think I've been even crazier over Chris than Alex.

crap.

Do I have a crush on Christen? I mean, yeah, she's so beautiful, she's very smart, she's an extremely good striker, she's funny, and she's so organized, she's had an influence on me.

Alex was different.

With Alex, I felt like I was on top of the world, sure, but she didn't influence me the way Chris has. With Alex, I loved being around her, I loved making her happy, I loved everything about her.

With Christen, I feel happy with her. I want to be around her. I want to hear her laugh. I want to be with her all the time. I want to love her the way I loved Alex. That's right. Loved. Lately with Alex, I feel like we're best friends, who kiss. We're best friends, who sleep together. We're best friends, with a couple benefits. I feel like her and Servando have that connection we used to have. That connection that I'm beginning to lose with her and starting up with Chris. And I don't know how to respond to it. I don't know what to do.

I've been sitting in my bed for the past 30 minutes thinking about this. The hour before that I was pacing back and forth in the room thinking about our first game tomorrow. It's now June 15. We've been in camp for a while, but Pia gives us plenty of free days to visit family. She wants us to spend a lot of time together, however, to prepare us for the Olympics and get used to each other. Which, isn't that bad of an idea. So far I've spent a little less than 3 months rooming with Christen. Pia changes the room assignments every other week, and each time I've been with her. Alex, however, is a different story.

After the first few days, Alex said she began to feel claustrophobic. She said 3 people was too much for one room, even though the room was of significant size. Pia asked if we still wanted to be roomed together, and when I noticed Alex hesitate, I said that it didn't matter, and that I'd rather have her room with other people to build chemistry like the one we have. I don't know what's gotten into her, because she's seemed more distant from me. She still talks to everyone, and we're still partners for everything, but she doesn't act like my girlfriend anymore. I have to do something.

"TOBIN"

I get so scared I fall of the bed. "SHIT"

"oH CRAP"

Chris helped me up. "I'm sorry Tobs. I didn't mean to scare you."

I shake it off. "It's alright Chris. It's not your fault."

She smiled at me. "Wanna tell me why you were staring at the wall for the 5 minutes I was calling you?"

I smiled back. "Nope. In fact, I was just about to leave. So, if you'll excuse me, I'll be on my way." I'm about to walk out the door before I turned around. "Oh, hey Chris?"

She had started walking towards her bed, then turned to look at me. "Yeah, what's up?"

"Why were you calling me?"

"Oh, I was gonna ask you something, but not anymore."

I fell silent for a moment. "I'd still like know what it was."

She frowned. "It's not important, don't worry about it. I was just gonna ask for your opinion on something, but I think you're already busy."

I closed the door and walked over to her. "If you're gonna ask me if something looks good on you, trust me, everything does." I winked at her, and she giggled. I loved hearing that sound. I could listen to it on repeat all day.