Johnlock One-shots

259.What Are They??

"We're not married. Why would you think that? What do we possibly do to make you, of all people, think we're married?" Sherlock asked, leaning against his chair.

"You call each other by pet names," Lestrade said and nodded. "And you wear rings."

"No we don't." Sherlock took off his ring and stuffed it into his pocket. "And we don't call each other by pet names."

"What do bees make?" Lestrade asked.

"Honey?" Sherlock responded, sounding a bit unsure because the question was so random.

"Yes, Sherlove?" John called from the kitchen. Sherlock leant down and put his face in his hands.

"Are you two married?" Lestrade asked, raising a brow. Sherlock put his ring back on and scoffed, crossing his arms.

"Pfft, no," he blew a curl out of his eyes casually.

"Are you engaged?" Lestrade tilted his head.

"Uhm..." Sherlock looked into the kitchen, where John was sitting and doing puzzles on the newspaper. "John?" He asked.

"Yes, Cutie?" He looked towards Sherlock. Lestrade chuckled and rolled his eyes.

"Are we engaged?" He asked.

John laughed and shook his head. "Of course not, Love. We're just really good friends." He stood up and walked to the living room with him and Lestrade. He kissed Sherlock's lips and Sherlock leant into it, setting a hand on his chest. "Why do you ask?" He pulled back and Sherlock pouted for more.

"Oh," Lestrade watched this, smiling. "Are you boyfriends?"

"No," John shook his head and took Sherlock's hand.

"We're not boyfriends." Sherlock agreed, squeezing John's hand. John looked down at him and smiled, pulling him up a bit to connect their lips again.

"Okay, well are you in love?" Lestrade asked, watching them, John was now sitting on Sherlock's lap, arms around his shoulders.

"I don't know. John, are we in love?"

"We have a very... heterosexual relationship." John whispered against Sherlock's lips, kissing him softly.

"It's just bromance." Sherlock joked and set his hands on John's waist, kissing him back.

"Uh huh, sure, okay," Lestrade nodded. What were they doing? What are they? Are they in love? Just kidding around?

They both closed their eyes and leant into the kiss. Lestrade put his hands on his hips and stared at the two.

"Okay, so when's the wedding?" He asked.

"In a week," John mumbled.

"We're not in love, or engaged," Sherlock responded, looking up at Lestrade.

"Okay, uh, I'm just going to go now, and allow you love birds to decide on what you are." He walked away and left. Immediately after that, the two were kissing again, absolutely, madly, and completely in love.