~Reylo One Shots~

Moments - Rey

A/N
WARNING THERE ARE SPOILERS FOR THE LAST JEDI IN THIS CHAPTER IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN THE MOVIE PLEASE DO NOT READ THE FOLLOWING. Seriously though like we're in MAJOR spoiler territory for Rey and Kylo. You still here? Alright here we go...

It had been three months since Crait. Three months since Luke Skywalker faded into the Force. It's been three months since I had seen Ben Solo.

Even now I can remember each and every detail of our last Force vision. I can still feel my shaking hand press the button to close the hatch. I can see his eyes pleading for me not to go. I can hear the conflict still hear the battle raging inside him. I am stuck in the moment that was doomed to be our last.

But it's not the only moment we share. No, there are plenty of them. There are those that I will cherish until my dying breath. The ones where Ben Solo stood beside me. Then there were ones like Crait. The moments that tear you apart from the inside until only a shell was left.

The moment when I first felt hope was when we sat in the stone hut on Atch-To. The rain pounding on the roof above. He sat across from me as I wrapped myself in a warm blanket. It was cold that night and wind would periodically rush through the building.

He had told me I wasn't alone, and suddenly I couldn't have been warmer. The chilled air was long gone then. I had told him he wasn't either. Then as he reached out to touch my hand I had seen a future where we were together.

A place where The First Order didn't matter. A time when it was just Ben and I, and we were happy. This was my favorite moment of all.

Then came the moment of denial. Snoke was dead we were victorious. I could see that future, and it was in my grasp. In our grasp. I had felt invincible.

Until everything came crashing down. He asked me to join him, and the future I saw went up in flames. I couldn't stay and he couldn't go. We were back at square one. We were on opposite sides of something so much bigger than ourselves that we couldn't control.

But I couldn't give up yet. I begged him not to leave.

"Don't go this way," are the words I had used. He didn't listen. I was forced to fight him for Luke's saber. I should have hated him by now. I should have been angry for trusting him, but I wasn't.

It was more of a terrible sadness. Like a disease you couldn't cure that broke you down piece by piece until there was nothing left. I couldn't let go. I told myself Ben was still there.

Then our last and final moment came. Crait. This was my moment of anger. I was angry with Luke for letting Ben become this. I was angry with Ben for not coming with me. I was angry with myself for believing he could change. This was the moment I broke Ben Solo.

The moment that changed everything. The moment I will remember forever. But within all these moments one thing remains true.

Ben is still there, and I can't give up yet.