"I'm Sorry"

Prologue

They say that your drunk thoughts are what your sober consciousness wants.
Does that mean I want you?

I can't get you out of my mind. All I see is your eyes, one blue and one grey, your soft lips . . . But I know I can't have you.

Nor would you ever want someone like me. Someone like me, so undeserving, unworthy and far too ugly to even be in your presence.

Besides, you already have someone else. Someone who makes you smile, who loves you more than I ever could.

She's everything I'm not.

She's everything you'll ever want.

Looking back on that night, it was a mistake, it was wrong, and it was the night I lost you forever. I lost my only chance of ever being in love, after rejecting you to protect myself. To protect myself from the inevitable heartbreak, from the tears that I knew were bound to come, and from you.

You, my true mate, Xavier Black.

"Mate!" I knew it was you the night of the party. It was only a minute past midnight, but it was officially my eighteenth birthday. I knew you were older than me.

"What are you waiting for? Go get him!" That's exactly what I couldn't do. That's exactly what I forbade myself from doing.

You knew.

You knew long before I knew.

Yet, here you are, your arms around her, whispering sweet nothings to her, but the worst part is your smile. It's so beautiful, it hurts. I'll never be the one you give that dazzling grin to.
She's the only one who'll be on the receiving end of that smile. I didn't want to be the one to break your happiness for my own selfishness.
I'll just pretend to everyone, my friends and family that nothing has changed, that I haven't found you.

It'll be okay. It's for the best. I'll be alright. Maybe.

Author's Note
Back again! This time around it's gonna take a different route, the original route I had for this story.