Equals ft. Logan Paul

Ten

As Josh and I walk back into the building we see girls crying. Either from happiness, because they made the cut or from pure sadness. I feel more nervous than I did before the casting. What if all my hard work has been for nothing? What if I'm not good enough?

More girls are called in and thereafter send home, crying. I think one in 20 girls or so is accepted, probably less. "Brooke Ray can you come in please?" I stand up and follow the women inside.

There I stand, merely wearing lingerie, in front of the producers again. I force a smile on my face eventhough I'd rather hide behind the covers right now. I will not let them see my vulnerability! The dark haired women smiles at me. Oh god, I didn't make it. They are going to send me home.

"Brooke, we really loved your energy and confidence." Her tone is comforting.

Ok this is the end.

"So are you available November 14th?" OMG I'm in, I'm fucking in!

Shrieks of joy escape my mouth and tears are falling down my cheeks, I sink down onto my knees. My hands covering my face, my emotions taking the best of me. "Thank you, thank you so much! This is honestly a dream come true."

I hug all of them and eventually say goodbye. "See you soon, guys." While leaving the room.

I walk out the door where Josh is using my camera to document this, I jump into his arms, crying. "I made it, I fucking made it."

"I'm so proud of you! We're going to celebrate tonight!"

I take the camera and tell the viewers what happened. "-you guys this is insane! I don't really know what to say or do but I'm just overjoyed and blessed. This is all because of you and I-"

I sigh while the tears are starting to fall, again. "I love every single one of you so much, it's insane."

After this long, sappy monologue I go back to put my clothes back on.

In the changing room I see my model friends Alice and Barb who apparently also got into the show. I congratulate them before taking a quick photo. (Top photo.)

Immediately my phone explodes with felicitations, nothing can touch me in this very moment. I feel like I can take the entire world up on my shoulders.

"Great pic, it already has 5000 likes in like 2 minutes." Josh says while looking down at my Instagram page.

My eyes go over him, my manager and at this moment all I want to do is celebrate this success with something grand. "Let's go buy a car, I don't wanna talk it over with Bob. I know I have the money to buy any vehicle." Let's be wreckless,  impulsive.

Josh first looks at me with question but then quickly realizes I'm determined. "Okay let's do it." Josh approves, we're both extremely excited. I get into Josh's car before he drives off.

"I want something classic" I chuckle.

When we get to the vintage car dealer I ask to look at a few classic models. Ferraris, Porsches, any vintage car you can imagine, they have it. Two hours and $150.000 later I have my new car. An absolute beauty.

As I pull up to my apartment complex in my new car I see Amanda, George, Evan and Logan standing outside. George is filming Amanda slapping Lohan right across the face. Ha!

What are Logan and Evan doing here? They moved out like two months ago. "Hey guys." I say excited.

"Wow is this new?" George asks while touching the fresh black paint.

"Yes I just bought it as a gift to myself. She's a renewed vintage." I say proud.

"New engine and everything?" Evan asks. I nod.

"Congratulations getting the show Brooke." Amanda says on a kind of sarcastic tone while I give my car to the valet service.

"Thank you!" Nothing can kill my joy today. Everyone else also congratulates me. They are filming a skit and have to continue so I say goodbye.

Logan was awfully quiet, we haven't really talked since the kiss. And why was Amanda being weird?

I walk into the Lobby as I suddenly get turned around.

It's Logan. "Hey congratulations on getting the Victoria's Secret Fashion show, that's savage! So are you doing anything later?" He touches the back of his neck while flexing his biscep.

"I'm actually having dinner with my manager to celebrate and then I'll probably go out." I answer scanning his face, where is this coming from? as I turn around again, I don't feel like talking to him right now.

He runs to stand in front of me again. I sigh, "Logan can we just forget what happened the other night and be friends?" His contagious smile washes off his face and makes place for an expression of relief. What?

He sighs, "Oh thank god, that's just what I wanted to say. We can not mix business with pleasure." He chuckles.

What the actual fuck just happened. He sees the surprised look on my face, "Oh you're not used to anyone turning you down honey?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" He shakes his head and turns around, leaving me full of questions. Well okay then.

Back in my apartment I call my parents back in New York to tell them the good news, they're so proud of me.

After a long conversation with my parents I go to take a bath and watch some 'Keeping up with the Kardashians'. I know, I know... it's just guilty plessure entertainment. I just want to unwind from today and look pretty for dinner tonight.

It's about an hour before dinner when I start getting ready. I go for the expensive Gucci dress with my classic Miu Miu heels. I bought them brand new in New York four months ago. It's not very LA but then again I'm not very LA. The outfit is très chic, maybe even a little too chic however it's my big day today. I vlog me getting ready and talking a little bit about the casting.  

(The outfit)

I drive my new car to the popular restaurant Catch where Josh and I are supposed to meet.  I give my new baby (car) to the valet parking and walk into the restaurant.

As I walk in I catch (catch haha) my reflexion in a mirror, oeeeeh I look good.

I'm really feeling myself tonight, the most trendy place in LA, Gucci dress. Damn Brooke you're doing good.

"Reservation for Ray" I say to the lady. She smiles and escorts me to our table. She stops at a round table centering for a fancy grey leather booth.

But when I look up I see not only my manager Josh but joining him are Logan Paul and his manager Jeff....