Destiny

Chap ~ 5

Shubha's Pov:

I was playing with my bangles while standing at my husband's bedroom's window ,I meant our bedroom's window.

Moon was looking so beautiful. The wind blew and my loosened strand tickled my sensitive neck, that simple thing brought the beautiful memory and occurrence happened a few hours ago. Again I dived in that foreign and exotic feeling.

How his fingers brushed and tickled my sensitive neck while tieing the Mangalsutra around my neck.

How I just stopped breathing and something weird happened in my stomach. I didn't knew this types of feelings existed in this world. And then he filled my maang with sindoor. I felt like he was feeling the most important place in my life. He filled my loneliness , the deficiency of my life.
I felt whole and content.

Yes , I was married . I was someone's wife.I was Mrs.Shubha Mahatmya Shah . I was enjoying the beauty of moon and the most beautiful memory of my life. Then Suddenly. ...The bedroom opened and my husband walked in.

He was wearing a sweat pants and full sleeved t-shirt. The sleeves of his t-shirt was rolled up to his elbow. After my grihpravesh my mother-in-law and other members dragged me to complete other rituals and I thought he got the time to change.

I couldn't believe my husband could look so sexy and handsome not to forget dominating in this simple causal wear. Did I just said sexy ?

God I had never used this word for any man and suddenly my mind called my husband sexy. .!!! God did I just thought something wrong and dirty ? Please forgive me God.

He closed the door and unconsciously I took two step backward. This was the first time in my life when I was standing alone with a man in a closed room. He took long stride and my heart took liberty to pumped like mad in my ribcage. He stood in front of me with his Alpha-male glory. Only his presence was enough to dominate me and making me weak.

We had never met or talked then why he has this impact on me ?

"Shubha right ?" He inquired while tugging his hands inside his sweat pants. I nodded whilst taking the drape of my veil in my hand and twisting it. I was nervous more than nervous.

" Please take a sit Shubha and make yourself comfortable I want to talk something very important to you. "

He said while motioning me to sit on the bed.

"Please listen me and listen me very carefully". He began

" I want to clear every damn thing on this first night of our marriage. I know we had bound in very big responsibly and relation for the rest of our life. I am your husband now. But that will change nothing. I have duties and responsibilities as a husband. And I will fulfill them. I will give you anything you want. Money , respect , rights and place as a wife of mine in this house and society. I will never cheat on you. But you will never get any place in my heart and in my bed. I will never consummate this stupid marriage with you. I don't want any physical relation with you. I got married just to see my mom happy. This marriage is nothing to me. I seem rude but I don't want to give you any hopes. I am making this clear on very first night of our marriage because i want you to accept this reality as soon as possible. Our relation will be like this for the rest our life. " He said that like it was the most normal thing to say on your wedding night.

My heart shattered into million pieces. How I forgot that this Mahatmya Shah would never accept me as his wife. How i forgot that i was nothing in his life and I will never be.

I felt like somebody had cut my heart with sharp knife again and again. you know how a girl dreamed about her first night with her husband ? She expects sweet words from her husband not this types of bitter and acidic words. Thank God I was sitting otherwise I would have collapsed on the floor at that very moment his acidic and bitter words hit my ears. "

"You understand right ?" He asked and I nodded with so much difficulty. Yes difficulty because I was afraid. ..Afraid of my tears. What would happen if this simple gesture was responsible to burst my tears out of my eyes. I didn't want to cry in front of him. I had to move.

"Please excuse me I want to change" I said and turned my back towards him. And with that my tears got liberty to run down my checks and neck. I walked towards the bathroom . Thank God my mother-in-law has showed me the bathroom and closet otherwise.. .. ..

"Wait...." His husky and dominating voice echoed and I stopped in mid stride.

" I know my mom had told you so many things about my life and that things were enough to say no to this marriage. Then why you agreed to this marriage ? Why you choosed this loveless marriage ? Why you thrown your life in this hell I am living ?"

I closed my eyes and swolled the lump in my throat. I took long breath and with calm voice I replied " Some questions does not have any answers "

How I walked and reached in bathroom was the mestry to me. Because after closing the bathroom door I just collapsed on the floor and cried like mad. I cried with my heart and mind. For how long i stayed there and thought about my life i didn't know. But one thing was in my mind. My God has joined our life. And i would do anything I meant Anything to make this realatin work. To become his wife, his soulmate , his life partner , his everything.

I would try to brought happiness,love ,peace,warmth in his life. I would try to fulfil my every vows and oath I took while circling the holy fire during my Holy Matrimony.

I changed into two piece night wear and came outside the bathroom. He was sitting on the king side bed shirtless but that sight didn't affect me In any way. His bitter words had more impact on me. His six packs,muscular arms , broad chest didn't do wonders to Me because his bitter words were already doing wonders with my heart and mind.

I just stopped near the bed . Where would I sleep. I thought. The expression of my face told him what was I thinking because next thing he said. .. " This is a king size bed. There is more than enough space for both of us. We are bound together for the rest of our life. So its better we make our self comfortable. I will sleep this side and you sleep that side." With that he laid facing me.

So I moved from there and came to the other side of the bed. His back was facing me. I slowly laid there facing my back towards him. How a girl feel when she is sharing the bed with the man not to forget the man happens to be her husband for the first time in her life ?

I dragged myself to the edge of the bed and tucked the duvet under my chin tightly. Sleep was not in my mind but my eyes got tired of crying and I thought that was responsible to drag me in deep sleep.

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