[ON HOLD] ♡Arranged • GD & SM♡

f o u r t e e n

Days later...

September 20, 2017

--JANE--

It's been a few days since what happened with Grayson happened. I told him a bullshit lie as to why I was scared and now I have to keep going on with it. I mean, what can I fucking do? My husband is fucking clueless, and my psychotic stalker says he can't do shit to help me; the lie is that I have abandonment issues and that I'm afraid I'll lose him. I told him that my abandonment issues have only resurfaced because I'm back in a relationship where love is mutual. He believed it and thankfully won't leave me alone. I'm so scared that I deadass had him come in the bathroom with me while I used it. He's very respectful and non-judgemental so it's not weird, plus we've slept together before so I don't think that it would be weird -- we're married for fuck's sake!

Anyway, I've been very on edge lately, given my current situation. Even though I'm terrified to leave the house, Grayson took me to the doctor to see if I'm developing insomnia. Since my lie didn't fit into this situation, I masked my emotions and feelings and went with him -- making sure he didn't leave my side at all during the visit.

Apparently, it's true; I have mild insomnia. They gave me medication and I have to take the tablets twice a day with a meal. I don't want to take them, but I have to because Grayson is genuinely worried about me and wants me to get better. This whole situation is fucking bullshit all because someone is out there to get me. Honestly, what crime have I committed to deserve this uncertain fate? Was it crashing all those weddings in Europe? Because Grayson did that with me, although I did suggest it. Oh my fucking God, my life is a fucking mess! Why is the world against me?!

-

--Grayson--

It's been a few days since Jane has told me why she's scared. I'm honestly so sorry that she has abandonment issues and is scared to lose me. It's almost like when I was/am afraid that Shawn was going to steal her from me. Honestly, he's a fucking dick. Why the fuck does he always have to go after taken girls? What, are they hotter and smarter than single girls or something? Is it because they're already experienced? What's wrong with him, I just don't get it nor do I understand it. 

Anyways, we're currently having dinner and the chef, Eric, has made us some of his delicious lasagne. He always puts some fresh basil on top and in the layering he adds black olives and mushrooms. It's so fucking great! I swear, I just feel like a better person inside after I eat it.

Jane is currently picking at her plate with an unpleasant expression painted across her face. I furrow my eyebrows. Even when Jane and I didn't like each other and Eric would make his lasagne, Jane would still eat it and always enjoyed it. Why is it different this time? "Jane, babe, why aren't you eating? You love lasagne." 

"I'm not in the mood." She turns to Eric, who is standing at the side with his hands behind his back. "I'm so sorry, Eric. I'm sure it's great, as always, but I'm not in the mood for it. Please forgive me." She has a genuine frown before turning to me with her hand out reaching for mine. "Can we go upstairs?"

"Baby, you have to eat your food; you have to take your meds before you can sleep. Don't you want to get better, baby?" I ask her, declining her offer.

"But, babe, I want to go to sleep without them; I'll get better without them." She tries to convince me; Keyword: tries. I give her a disapproving expression.

"Jane, eat your dinner then we'll go upstairs," I tell her sternly. Oh God, I feel a like a parent making their kid eat their vegetables. She gives me a pleading look before I decline once again. "No. You will eat your dinner then we'll go upstairs. I know that this relationship is mutual now, but I won't let you get away with everything; that's not being loved, that's being whipped and I won't allow it, Jane." She looks down and silently eats her dinner, almost afraid to look back up at me. I sigh. It's the first time I've yelled at her like this and I truly feel bad, but don't show it. I know she's scared and everything, but she can't act like a child. I have my sensitive, caring, and affectionate side, but that doesn't mean I don't also have my disciplinary, stern, and emotionless side. Love always has two sides; You can't feel one side without feeling the other -- it's impossible. It's healthy for couples to fight and shit, but I'm not saying that it should be like before Jane and I were on the same page of loving each other. 

Everyone who was standing in the kitchen aside from us -- Penny, Piper, Eric, James, Ash -- stands with their heads down, almost as if in fear of me. Fuck, here we go again; back to square one with everyone hating me.

Jane finishes her food in silence and we go upstairs together. As we ascend the stairs, I hold her hand firmly as I lead. I can almost imagine her walking with her head down, but she needs this discipline.

-

--JANE--

Grayson is currently taking a shower. I know that I'm scared and I never want him to leave me, but after dinner, I'm intimidated by him. I decided to just get myself ready for bed as he showers. I go change into a silk pair of short-shorts that comes with a baby pink laced bralette and a silk baby pink coloured robe. I brush my hair out and wash my face in my personal bathroom when I suddenly get a call from a blocked number. My heart almost stops. I don't want to pick up, but I know that if I don't that something bad could possibly happen.

I reluctantly pick up the phone and put it up to my ear. "What?" I answer.

"Ooh, the baby is feisty today!" What a creep! "I think that makes you even sexier! Soon, you'll be calling me 'daddy' just like you were to your clueless husband just a few weeks ago."

I choke on my breath before replying. "Why are you doing this to me? What the fuck have I done to you?"

"It's not what you did per se, it's what your husband did to me." He then chuckles. "I'm sure soon you'll be able to figure me out; but what's the use? No one can stop me because they're all powerless next to me." I feel my tears forming and the lump in my throat rising.

"Why me? That's all I want to know aside from why you're doing this." I choke out and he chuckles again.

"Because I'm madly in love with you, Jane and I want to be there for you. And since you clearly won't oblige to leave Grayson for me, I have to take some extra measures to be with you. Remember, I have eyes and ears everywhere so don't try anything. Also, here's some evidence since you're so curious; I know I can treat you better." Before he can continue anymore the line cuts off and I'm a teary mess. I clear my call log, wash my face, take my pills, then get nestled into my bed. I'm facing away from where Grayson's bathroom door is so he can't see me. 

I lay there motionless as I silently cry before I feel the bed dip and hands wrapping around my waist. I don't move from my spot nor make a sound. I feel Grayson pull me close to his chest so we begin spooning. He moves his head up and kisses the side of my neck before placing his head in the crook of it. "I know you probably think I'm a dick right now, but I want you to know that I'm sorry. It's just... I don't like relationships where a person in the relationship is the pushover; this is a team effort and it should be like we're working together. I know you're not sleeping because I heard you crying as I got out of the bathroom, and if it's because of me, I'm sorry. I just truly want to see you get better. It breaks my heart to see you like this, so just try to put in an effort to get better... for me? Please? That's all I'm asking. I love you, goodnight, baby." I feel his head get heavy as he goes into the world of sleep and oblivion. 

I sigh. If only I could tell him that my life is in danger and that I'm being watched by a psychotic stalker. I decide to soon join him in the world of sleep and oblivion as I try to figure out who is watching me and wanting me.

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IM EXCITED TO KEEP THIS BOOK GOING AHHHH!

Who do you guys think is watching Jane? Don't comment if you know, I want it to be a surprise until a few chapters later.

Have a great weekend lovelies!

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