Dear Dan,

011.

I lie on my mum's couch that night and reflect on the day. Deaths, confessions, it was all overwhelming. I look towards my suitcase and think about reading Dan's father's letter. I stand and find the letter and lie back down and begin reading.

Dear Grazia,

I am very disappointed in you, you failed to get one thing right in your book - I was not a good person in the hour of my death, I died the same way I was born, crying and needing things. I was just as selfish coming in as I was going out, and that's one thing I think needs to be changed, but even if you don't change it, that's okay, I like knowing you think that highly of me, even if I never once thought to think so highly of you, until now.

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say you didn't tell my son that you were showing me your book, and I'm going to also say you probably have yet to show him your book. I'm not sure how much he will like the book, considering it talks about our lives so closely, but I hope he does take the chance to read it, you write so effortlessly, even I felt sorry for myself by the end.

You wrote, "I feared death, but I feared living any longer even more. I feared I would have to see all of the people I screwed over before I got to heaven if there even is one. I feared my son wouldn't' visit me before I died. I feared my wife would drink herself to death. I feared all of that and more. I feared I lived this life for no reason, no reason at all."

While that is true, and I feared those things since I found out how close to death I was, you missed some things and got some things wrong. I am writing this, and I might as well be dead already, I feel dead. I am staring across the room at my sleeping wife, she drools, never let her deny that.

I stop reading to laugh and touch my face, wet from tears. Immediately, I start reading again after I grab a tissue.

I am staring at her, and she is so beautiful. From the way her hair is falling down her face to the way, her mouth hangs open when she's asleep. I missed out on all of this my whole life, and I don't deserve her, never have, never did. But I loved her, believe that. I love her with everything I had, everything I ever did was to try and make her happy. Back to the book, thank you for being so correct about Jackie, she was and is everything you wrote about her. Beautiful, strong, passionate, mine.

I have to address something else about your book, too. The part about our relationship, you and me. I never thought you were good enough for my son, but even I had to admit his face lit up when he talked about you, he was on cloud nine when he met you. I hope it stays that way forever, and I am confident now that you will be everything my son needs you to be. You are everything he needs you to be. Here's the thing, I think it's really me son I'm worried about in that relationship - not you. He doesn't know how to be anyone else but himself, and that gets him into a lot of problems he can't get out of. He's hot-headed and has a bad temper, he is set in his ways, and we both know that by now. Just do me a favour, and don't give up on him, he has no one else but you. He loves no one but you.

I am sorry for not making your wedding day, but my son threatened me. Imagine me with a smile on my face right about now, because the situation is humorous. I'm sure you made one of the most beautiful brides. I have a lot of regrets about my life, Grazia. One of them is not treating you the way I did, though, and I hope you can understand that anything I've ever said or done to hurt you or your relationship with my son was to protect him. I imagine a day when you will come to terms with that and accept it. I do care for you, you are giving me and my wife a grandchild and I couldn't ask for a better gift from someone. Just do me a favour and make sure the kid - if it's a boy - carries the family name, and possibly (if they're interested) they learn the family business and one day have enough knowledge to carry it on. Thank you, for everything.