ruled

part 9

I stretch my arms as I wake up. My underground feels soft. I open my eyes and slowly start to realize what happened earlier. 

I'm pregnant.

the words are scratched inside my brain and they make my head go fuzzy. 

what time is it. I think. I lift my head to see my clock. 11:00 am. I've mist my two first classes.

great, I broke a rule again... 

At least I'm not tired anymore.

to go to school as fast as possible I skip breakfast. I rush to the door and walk out of my street. 

while I walk I'm feeling lightheaded. It feels strange because I've never felt it before like this. it's not an normal kind of lightheadedness. this feeling is extraordinary rare. It feels like my feet don't connect to my romp and that my head is underwater.

I balance on each step I take.

right, left, right, left.  why do I feel this weird?  my lungs shrink together and my body shocks. 

a sour taste enters my mouth.

not now. please. I think.  this is not the perfect timing to remind me of this pregnancy.

my sight becomes blurry. I walk further.  My school is only a couple of meters away now. 

hold on. I think. you're almost there.   but just before I reach school, I need to throw up.

when I'm done I feel even worse. this was just another symptom to convince my nightmare.

"Isabel? is that you?"

I roll my eyes.  "hello Bea. " I say grumpy.   "mrs Greenheart said I needed to tell your in detention tonight.  because you've missed his class today. teachers are not happy with you Isabel. do something about it"   she says.

"and why would I listen to you?" I blurt out while I raise one eyebrow.

"that's not my choice.  But don't blame me when you're in trouble again." Bea says smirking.

again? again!! How does she know I had trouble?  that's strict secret and personal. they would never tell her.. unless she indicated me.

I feel so angry my eyes start to water. 

"how do you know!!"  I yell

"you made them come to me, didn't you?!!"

Bea grins. "that's what happens when you don't appreciate the rules, I had no choice, had I."

I bite my lip. I've sacrificed the real me for it. I was unhappy for weeks.  all because of one single girl who clearly doesn't have any self respect.

I could just slap her right now and get in trouble. to be honest I wouldn't regret it. I feel like it.

eventhough I want to do it, I walk away.

almost nothing remains of my old life. a month ago, I destroyed it, I refused my friends in town, I changed my clothes, My hair looks different, even my body changed. the only area that escaped my change are my thoughts. I don't know why exactly.  Perhaps  because my brain is too strong. 

I hear a loud yell and I see Bea on the ground with her arms arround her knee. students run outside of their classes and a squad of teachers checking for returning students.  But no one is returning except me.

I grin and plump down on the first seat I see. I wouldn't even go and help bea if I were the last person on earth.  No way I would ever help her.