fever dreams ; kylo ren

ii. something's wrong

"He's a monster."

"She means nothing to me."

"I'm sorry."

"What have I done?"

Neve awoke with a gasp, her heart beating fast. Her breathing was erratic. Her long red hair that had been neatly braided before bed was now coming undone, hairs sticking to her sweaty skin.

Unsurprisingly, the first thing she thought of was Ben. It's what she always thought of, every day without fail. Sometimes she felt as though the thoughts were forced into her head.

She saw images of him flash in her dream. Most of the words spoken were said by him. None of them were memories, except for her voice calling him a monster.

She sighed, using one of her hands to peel her hair away from the sweaty skin. She didn't have to rush herself this morning, although she did have a mission to get ready for.

A man named Lor San Tekka, a close ally to General Organa, apparently possessed a map that would help them find Luke Skywalker. Neve and Poe, a pilot and a good friend of Neve's, were being sent to acquire the map.

Neve sat in bed for a moment, staring blankly at the wall in front of her. She took a minute to enjoy the silence. Life on D'Qar was typically chaotic. There were always people buzzing around doing something. Silence was a rare occurrence.

Neve threw the blankets off of her legs, the cold air welcoming the newly exposed skin. It sent shivers through her body, but at the same time relaxed her. It reminded her of her home planet.

The redheaded woman pulled herself out of her bed. She showered and brushed her teeth slowly, savoring the calm atmosphere. She knew that once she left her room, it'd be a while before there was another calm moment.

She stood in a towel as she dug through her clothes, searching for something to wear. It had to accommodate Jakku's hot weather.

As she grabbed some clothes, she couldn't help but miss the simplicity of having one designated outfit. 'Like at the academy.' She thought.

She quickly dismissed those thoughts. She dressed, pulled her boots on, and buckled her saber holster.

The holster wrapped around her waist, as well as around her right leg. She liked it, it made her lightsaber easy to reach. Although it did make her weapon rather obvious.

Before she exited her room, she pulled said lightsaber from a drawer in her nightstand.

After the massacre at the academy, she had to make a new one. Her old one had melted in the fire.

Her new one was pretty similar to her old one. Her old one had been a dark blue with a sleek, simple hilt. Her new one had an almost exact replica of her old hilt, but the crystal now emitted a teal color.

She placed the weapon into its holster and exited the comfort of her room.

She was immediately greeted by the hustle and bustle of the Resistance. Everyone was running around, doing whatever their job was.

Neve made her way to the cafeteria, a place she'd only been in a handful of times. But she knew Poe would be there. He would always invite her to eat with him and his pilot friends.

Upon entering, Neve's eyes moved around the large room, searching for the charmingly disheveled man.

Her eyes quickly found the young pilot. He was sitting alone, something surprising to her.