Opposites That Aren't So Opposite

Side Story - More Than Okay

I sat with my arms crossed, not paying any particular attention as Kyle started our third lesson together. Over the past few weeks, I had caught up in my homework and I was getting good grades, so I really didn't understand why my Aunt insisted we continue these lessons. It was an annoying bother.

"Kayson." Kyle's voice brought me out of my thoughts and back to the present. "Are you even paying attention?" he asked.

My eyes drifted up to meet Kyle's slowly, confusion probably showing in them more than I had meant it to. Upon seeing his face, my cheeks reddened with embarrassment and I looked away. "I was..." I mumbled into my shoulder.

He sighed. "No, weren't. What did I just say?"

I blew out with a frustrated huff. "That I'm not paying attention..." I muttered.

He clenched his teeth and I knew I had made him angry. "It's annoying to teach someone who isn't going to listen," he snapped, dropping his pencil and crossing his arms. "At least try to take notes or something."

I rolled my eyes, but pulled out a notebook and pencil. He watched me as I set them out on my desk. However, before he could resume his teaching, I grumbled, "I'm doing fine without your help. I don't see the point in these lessons."

Kyle sat back and pressed his lips together firmly, looking at me. "Then why don't you just leave?" he said. "You don't like me and you don't need me so just leave if you want." When I just stared at him, he started picking up his things. "Get out," he said.

I could hear the hurt mixed into the harshness of his voice and it tugged at my conscience making me feel guilty. I looked away. "That's not what I meant..."

Kyle scoffed and stopped packing to glare at me. "Really? Didn't you say you found me annoying? But that's not what you really meant. You just used that word by accident," he said, falsely giving me the benefit of the doubt. When I couldn't reply, too choked up with regret, he sighed for the second time and went back to picking up his things. "If that's how you feel then why do you keep coming?"

I didn't know how to answer. I couldn't just say it; I couldn't just tell him why. He'd laugh, or tell everyone and then if he didn't laugh they would. Or he'd call me disgusting and I'd have even more guilt to hold on my shoulders. No, there was no good answer to his question, at least none that I had the courage to say. In the end, I snatched my things up from the table and didn't even bother to put them in my bag before hurrying towards the door. I was just about to leave when Kyle muttered something under his breath. "Unbelievable..."

I stopped in my tracks, hand on the door knob. Then I turned around and stormed back to him. Courage or no courage, he had no right to say that. He turned just in time for me to reach him and jab a finger in his face. "I'm unbelievable?! It's your fault!" I snapped.

He blinked, surprised to see me suddenly so fired up. "My fault?" he asked dumbly.

"Yes, your fault. All your fault!" I shot back, steam practically flowing out my ears from how angry I was, how frustrated; and it only seemed to get worse when I looked at him, and I started into a ramble that I didn't even know I was saying. "All you ever do is walk around looking pretty, smiling and making girls swoon in your arms, and I have to see it! I have to look at you all day and see that smile, and hear your voice, and try, try to pretend like I don't notice, like I'm not mentally drooling over you like you're some kind of cake, because, so help me God, if I admit it, I'll probably have to shoot myself from sheer embarrassment! So, yes, Kyle. It's your fault and I am more than fucking believable!"

A silence passed between us as Kyle blinked at me incredulously. Then, in the barest of whispers, he said, "You mentally drool over me?"

The instant his words registered my face was as red as a tomato. But I would not lose my pride and instantly replied. "Maybe. Maybe I do more than drool."