Reject

Chapter 5: Beginning

           

JAMIE

No words could explain how I feel right now. As soon I was done drying my hair and feel refreshed after a hot shower, I threw myself on bed, face flat, and bounced against the soft mattress. Something was trying to get out of my chest, wailing, growling non-stop after what happened between Luke and the woman he called Cass. She looked perfect, demure and sophisticated. Unlike the stray me whom Luke just picked up from nowhere.

After Cass left, Luke became painfully silent. Though he stayed and continued slicing bits of chicken for me, his mind ran after her.

The rest of the afternoon, he introduced me to a few pack members who came to visit as soon as they heard the news of me arriving in the pack house. Luke's intense atmosphere could again be felt that even the other pack members were stiff, masking their fake pleasantries. Even I was forced to put on that fake smile when my supposed to be mate was drowning in his own depressions of not going after that Cass girl. He could've put on a smile, even if it was just make believe, so as to give a little bit respect to me. But he didn't. If I'm not his mate, would he even dare look at me?

I clutched the pillow underneath me. I don't even know what I feel. I laughed like a lunatic earlier as if I was possessed by some lovesick flirty ghost who would get the tingles just by Luke's mere presence. Idiot. I have never let someone in that easily and never did I imagine that I could be like this to him in just a span of a day. I can't even believe that I'm already getting used to this werewolf and mate thing.

"I think I'm under a spell." I murmured to myself.

Just the thought that I even let him feed me made me cringe. It felt like I'm being controlled by something inside. It was burning and I felt hot.

You're starting to like him. A woman's voice in my head said.

"No! No! No!" I stood up and raked my hair backwards. There's that voice again. It's been haunting me from time to time ever since I left the orphanage, "Stay away from me whoever you are!"

I am you. You can't make me disappear.

"Ignore, Jamie." I heaved a deep breath, "Don't let yourself go crazy."

My feet strode towards the floor to ceiling panelled glass doors and the moment I swung it open, soft fresh summer breeze brushed my hair. I took a step towards the veranda and wide array of swaying trees greeted me, a small cemented road created a tunnel in between. The skies were clear, stars twinkled on the horizon and the moon was bright, telling me that a full moon will be in a few days. I then suddenly felt a stinging but manageable pain on my back.

"It's too early to have back pains, Missy." I murmured to myself.

"Cassandra, don't leave!"

My heart pounded just hearing his sudden plead in the middle of the solemn night. I peeked from the balcony and there I saw them, standing in front of a black sedan. Sandra held Luke's face as the latter looked down. She whispered something that even my vivid senses couldn't decipher. I felt my heart clenched when Luke hugged her.

"So much for being mates..." I murmured.

What do I expect? I'm just a reject. My parents didn't want me, no one adopted me, the list goes on. If Luke already has someone he love, then why would he go after me? We could've lived our own separate lives peacefully and he could be together with Sandra. Is it only because he has to? Is it because of his fucking werewolf business?

I should've known better.

Cassandra's eyes met mine. I automatically squatted and crawled my way back inside, my jeans scrubbing against the carpeted floor. "God. I'm becoming so pathetic."