Shadows of My Past

Chapter 16

It's been 2 months since Buck tried to kidnapp me.

2 months since I found Ava.

And so far, everything's quiet.

No sightings of stalkers, or anything - anyone - that could be a danger towards me.

I'm not certain whether they've given up or not. Maybe they're still plotting; trying to figure out different ways to lead me towards them. I still don't know what it is they want or their connection to me.

So many questions that have yet to be answered.

But I guess, as they say, some questions are better left a mystery.

Some doors, are meant to be left unopened.

Clay has been bringing home a girl. Her name is Addison. Though she's shy around the apartment, Clay has mentioned that she is a "partier". I find it kind of hard to trust her..

Then again, who can I trust now a days?

Damian has loosened his "rules" on me, but not by much. It's rare that I leave the house, even to take out the trash. Clay and Damian have sacrificed themselves for groceries and any other living items.

Damian finally found a job working in a pharmacy downtown.

He and Clay have been somewhat working out their differences... they still debate over who should be the one watching over me, but of course Damian always wins. Mostly because I choose him.

Ava seems to be taking the change the hardest. Though she always manages to have a beautiful smile plastered onto her face, I can tell it's tough for her. I know she wishes she had a family to comfort her, friends to make her laugh. A mother to tell her that no matter the horrible situation, everything will be ok. Damian, Clay, and I will never be able to fill that empty space yearning to have a normal, happy childhood. But I know she appreciates our effort to be there for her.

My paranoia has gotten worse. I've been having nightmares; reoccurring ones. It starts out with a happy moment, usually with Damian. and then the sky will start to blacken. I go to look back at Damian, and he has no eyes. Just black holes. He starts bleeding from this mouth, and then there's a voice in the background. Last night I could make out the words; " it's time to die now."

And then I wake up screaming. Ava is always the first one there. She wraps me in her small arms and listens while I cry in her lap.

Lights are suddenly becoming too bright for me to look at. Every sound makes my head start throbbing. I'm starting to lose all feeling of my emotions.... I feel nothing. I can't even force myself to feel sad anymore.

I feel like my body is closing in on itself.

The hallucinations are growing more and more frequent. Voices in my head, whispering. Shadows in the corner of my room. It's like I'm being haunted by my own mind.

I'm trying to be strong for everyone, especially for Ava. She needs me most right now. But I don't know what's wrong with me.

Damian finally convinced me that paying a visit to the doctor's was in my best interest right now.

So, here I sit, waiting to confide in a stranger who apparently goes by the name of "Dr. Morrison".

I swing my feet back and forth as I seat myself on a squishy and slightly uncomfortable platform. It didn't take long for the doctor to finally address me.

"Good afternoon, Ms. Tanner. What brings you in today?" he started scribbling onto his clip board as I described my nightmares, paranoia, mood changes, etc. ,nodding his head every so often. When I was finally quiet, Dr. Morrison stood up.