Seeing Me, Seeing You [COMPLETED]

~Chapter 16~ (Keri)

When Trevor gained back the slightest bit of his hearing in his right ear, it was like a miracle had happened. He heard the faint beat of "Boys Don't Cry" by The Cure playing from my phone, and he magically started to get better. The infection cleared up and the hospital gave him his discharge papers.

I hoped that upon returning home that maybe he would return to his normal, eccentric self; but it was apparent that his hearing loss had dramatically altered his life and his personality. He seemed more frustrated and agitated. He didn't want to go anywhere with me and refused to go back to work. A whole month had passed and I had given him his space to get adjusted to his new life. But one Saturday afternoon, I finally forced him to get out of the house. I asked him to come over to my apartment for lunch, where he had never been before.

I sat on the steps of my apartment building as I waited for his Uber to pull up to the front. When he arrived, he was dressed ready for the fall weather in a black sweater with a collared shirt underneath. He wore his leather jacket that Lavender had gotten him over it. I wasn't sure how he went about picking out his clothes everyday, but he looked as if he were going to a funeral. It was a very drab look on somebody who used to be more stylish.

He had grown his hair just long enough to cover his ears in order to hide his new hearing aids, that he reluctantly wore. He carried a new cane with red stripes, indicating that he had visual and hearing impairments. Completing his look, he work his signature Ray Ban sunglasses.

I greeted him with a kiss and lead him back inside to my apartment. "Thank you for coming. I figured that I could make us some sandwiches and just hang out for the day. It's been a while since we've done that. So, babe, are you ever going to come back to work?" I asked him while rummaging through my record collection to try and find some good music to put on.

"I don't know if I can, Keri. These stupid hearing aids make everything sound muffled and muddy. If I can't even tell how something is supposed to sound, then how am I going to fix guitars and amps properly?" He sighed.

"There are plenty of things that you could do around the music shop."

"Oh yeah? Like what?! Name one thing!" He asked as my cat rubbed his furry head against his leg, startling him, "...And what the hell is that?!"

"That's my cat, Jingles. He's a yellow tabby. And don't even worry about that. There is plenty that you can do to help me out around the shop... I'll think of something. "

"I knew it! You can't even name one thing," he sneered, "Why do you even stay with me, Keri? I'm useless."

It broke my heart that he thought that low of himself.

"You are not useless! Stop saying that! The reason why I stay with you is because I love you..." the words flew out of my mouth.

There was an awkward pause.

"... What?" He asked me, "I couldn't understand you. I know that you are soft-spoken, but can you please speak up?"

I cleared my throat.

"I said, 'The reason why I stay with you is because I love you.'"

Another awkward pause.

"... What?"

I cleared my throat again and walked closer to him so he could hear me better.

"... I said... 'I love you'"

"Put the music on and come sit with me," he said, catching me off guard. I was hoping for and 'I love you' back.

I dropped the pin on the record player  down onto an old forty-five of Elvis Presley's "Can't Help Falling In Love" and I sat down on his lap, brushing the cat away. I removed his sunglasses and sat them aside. With his eyelids closed, I brought him in for a tender kiss. He ran his hand down my cheek and tucked my wavy pink hair behind my ear. Something just didn't feel right and I began to get nervous. He held me in his arms as he rested his forehead against mine.

"I love you, but I don't deserve you," he whispered to me, "I'm sorry, but I knew that if I came here today, I would have to end things... I have to go."

I jumped off of his lap in a fury. "What do you mean that you have to go?! Trevor, why are you doing this? You just ruined a perfect moment! I didn't want to say it to just anybody... I picked you! I thought that maybe I finally had my Trevor back... but it turns out, you are just another asshole."

He unraveled his new cane and started moving towards my front door.

"I am not the same person that you fell in love with. I'm sorry, Keri, but I can't do this. This whole relationship thing is just too much for me right now."

"But... I was by your side day in and day out when you were sick! We have had so many great times together. Trevor, please don't leave..." I begged.

"My Uber is parked out front."

"And how do you know that?" I asked.

"It never left," he admitted. "I guess I am a bit of an asshole."

He touched the door to my apartment with his cane, found the doorknob and let himself out. I froze. I was so upset that I couldn't even move. I felt tears streaming down my face. He didn't even leave me with 'goodbye.'

Go after him! Go! I told myself... but I didn't. I just stood there alone in my cold apartment with my cat and the haunting voice of Elvis Presley coming out of my record player.

Wise men say, only fools rush in...

I was the fool. I should have seen the signs that our relationship was doomed to fail. It was there in that moment that I realized that maybe I was the one who was really blind.