thoughts on the wind

rain

in my world, it's always raining, shadowy, gray. the bright blue sky i gaze into is frequently overshadowed with pain. the sky mesmerizes me

but then i stab it, and rain falls. heavy, fast, a torrent. drowning me. washing me away. my foundations erode quickly, and then i fall, dripping rain off of every angle

i can't help it; i cower in the sunshine. though i bask in it, it strains my eyes. too much sunshine leads to clouds being stripped away. i don't want them wrenched off. i want their cover

i love the bright blue sky. i could stare at it for hours, feeling the warmth and color penetrating my skin. i could revel in its blueness and brag about it to all my friends. but at the same time, it makes me blind

so the rain is the only solution. pouring, drenching rain, overshadowing everything and bringing back the safety and cover of the clouds.

i know the sun come out and the blue sky will clear up. i love it and it makes me happy. but i can't deal with too much. it goes too far, is too invasive. the sun and blue reveal things i don't want to be revealed

there is no solution. i leave, and the sky darkens, thousands of drops falling. i stay, and my clouds are gone and i dry up in the light under the blue sky.

i'm caught in the middle. when it rains, i cry; but when sun shines, i die.

me and the sky? we will never be happy; i, not unless it rains through the sun, and he, not unless the sun shines through the rain.