Forgotten

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

            I stared at Brody’s letter. I hated everything. I hate how almost everyone who was ever close to me is dead, I hate how everyone is afraid of me, I hate what I did in the past, and I hate how I can never feel grief for Jamie or Brody.  They’re dead and I can’t even feel anything because I don’t remember anything about them.

I picked up the letter then placed it down again. I didn’t feel comfortable reading it. I didn’t know who I was or how I acted around him. It was as if the letter was addressed to someone else.

“He’s dead.” Ronnie’s words repeated within my mind. 

  I shook my head. I’m not going to read it. I shuffled out of my room then turned and muttered a curse. I stared at the letter again then ripped it out of the envelope and forced myself to read it.

Hey Rowan,

                        I wanted to talk to you but you apparently ended up in the hospital as well. Might as well call the hospital your home. I think that’s the fifth time this week.

By the time you’ll wake up I won’t be here so I decided to write this to you instead.

Remember when we were nine the three of us would sit around the kitchen table- you, me and Ronnie. We drew this huge map of some kind of paradise where we could live together. We drew this huge mansion with a horse stable, a swimming pool and a ride park on the yard. We had so much faith in this dream of ours that we began to believe it existed. We would search all these real estate open houses and were never satisfied.  We planned to live together but at these last days of living I began to wake up and realize that dream we once had could never happen.

When I’m gone try not to look for that dream but rather adapt into this life and one day make it your paradise. There’s still good in the world you just have to live it and see it with your own eyes.

I know you’re a bitch to everyone because that’s how he or she judges you to be but you also do this because you’re afraid of letting someone in and losing them. In a few days when you wake up I’m not going to be there for you. One day you have to open up and let someone in your life. One day a girl will come into your life and she’ll see you for who you really are. Maybe you’ll fall in love with her. I really wish I could see the badass Ro having feelings after all.

Ro, do me a favor and don’t give up on life. And if some stupid gang attacks you again, kick their asses for me.

Take care of Ronnie for me. Ronnie has always been unpredictable and I don’t know how she’ll take this. I wasn’t kidding when I said I wanted her to marry me. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. She’s one of the best things that ever happened to me.

It took me forever to think about what to write probably as long as you’ve been staring at the envelope (yes I know you that well) so try not to get all pissed and rip it up.

I hope your life becomes a paradise.

-Brody

I crumbled the letter only to smooth the page out to read it again. For once since I woke up on September 6th, I cried.

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Hey peoples! Sorry for the short chapter. I hope you like it though. I'll be writing longer chapters later.