for cookie2460
From: Your Barry
'I can't tonight, baby. I'm sorry. Maybe next time?'
She can't help but let out a heavy sigh, willing herself not to make a mental note that this is like the fifth time he had refused any effort of her to spend just a little bit of time with him. She knew it wasn't healthy and keeping scores was never really her thing but when her rationality is being clouded by her emotions, she found it very liberating to do so.
She didn't know when or how but somehow, she felt like he was drifting away from her. They'd only been dating for almost a year now and never did Barry made her feel this way - like he never has time for just the two of them, always finding excuses to "run some errands" whenever she initiates for them to do something together and he always seemed like his mind was somewhere else whenever they share how little time he could spare.
In short, he made her feel unwanted.
And to think that Barry, the one whom she thought was the love of her life, the one who promised her their always and forever, was the mere cause of this agonizing pain, is so much for her fragile heart to bear.
She knew the risks she was taking when she and Barry decided to give whatever connection they have a shot and for a moment there, she felt like they could make it. She strongly believed that they really do make quite a pair and even when they're just dating for almost a year, she knew she wouldn't have any problem spending the rest of her life with him.
But now, with the turn of events happening just weeks ago, she didn't know anymore. She knew she wasn't this overly emotional even for a woman but when a possible heartbreak is on the line, she can't help but tiptoe around the fine line of what's logical and what's not.
Letting out another sigh, she stared at his text with longing in her eyes not knowing what to reply so she just settled for not doing anything for the meantime.
She almost forgot that she wasn't the only one in the room and as soon as her best friend's voice broke her inner turmoil, she immediately gave him a smile, one that she knew wasn't fooling anyone especially him who she has seen as more of a brother than a friend.
"Okay, that's it." He moved his chair closer to hers, abandoning his slushie on a nearby table before looking her straight in the eye.
"You're going to tell me what's been bothering you and before you-"
"Cisco-"
"Ah! Nope, nah-uh." He extended a hand towards her, signaling that whatever excuse she's about to come up with, he's not buying it. "You just let out a sigh that's deeper than The Great Depression, Caitlin. I don't think I'll let you get off the hook easily this time."
By the way he's caging her with just the mere look of determination in his eyes, Caitlin knew she'd have to have this conversation with him right now, enough with all these lame excuse she's been coming up with as of late just to avoid this talk for as long as she could.
It wasn't a question of trust for they both knew that their bond is way past the point of being tested. They have gone through everything and they only came out of it stronger than before. Actually, it's more of their dynamic as a team and as a family that she's worried about. If ever she confirms her suspicions about her boyfriend, she knew there'll be a lot of consequences that the team has to face rather unwillingly.
"I don't know, Cisco." She shook her head, lower lip trapped between her teeth as she thought of what she should say next. "I just...what if my suspicions are true and we end up hating each other then most probably it'll affect the dynamic of the team one way or another but then I can't just leave because there'll be no one to tend to his injuries when it comes to worse."
