Scars and past times

Chapter 6 Regrets and More Road

As the day faded and the bright blue sky became dark and mysterious, my mind wandered down memory lane. I always remembered my dad took us on road trips. He would take his fancy truck and pack the back with different supplies and we would just drive. We passed road as more road came forth. The road was never ending in my eyes. My life was like a straight road. There was no end and no turns or curves. It was just a straight road. But now that I have left my baggage behind me and dropped the stupid maps, I can turn. That what I thought about my life. It was just a never ending straight row until now. I was free to turn the wheel.

The road stretched far and my eyes slowly drifted. All of a sudden a loud car horn rang at me shaking me awake from my light sleep. I drifted to the side of the road making a sharp turn and halting to a stop. My heart beats fast and my eyes scan for any broken or bruised areas. I cannot drive Like this anymore and climb to the back seats of my car which looks like a bed now. I crawl and slither under the blanket and rest my head on my pillow. I doze off and fall asleep in the back of my car.

I awake to a dream of Billy and the night he beat me. Instead of beating me he said he was sorry and started crying saying "I won't live without you!" And I forgave him. I don't know why but I felt as if he needed me. What if I could help him. I started thinking about going back and trying to save him from his new darkened life. He is like a caterpillar. What if he was pure as a caterpillar and this stage in life is like the caterpillar turning into a cocoon. And after the cocoon stage, he would become a beautiful and even more pure butterfly. I wanted to go back to my mom. I shouldn't have yelled at her. And then I remembered the glass and the bruises. I can't go back, I can't risk that happening to me again. That day repeated in my head and I began to tremble with fear. I got up from the back seats and head to the front of my car. It was cold that morning and a thick layer of fog covered some of the trees and grass. I turn on the ignition and turn on the heaters and start to drive again. Leaving that grassy area for more road.