Bond (Kylo Ren x Rey)

Buoy

Kylo breathed a sigh of relief as his feet hit the solid metal of the ramp to his shuttle. The desert wasn't his favorite environment, he decided. Making his way into the cockpit, he sealed the door shut behind him. The blackness of the ship encased him again, making him feel a bit safer than he had been in the bright light. Even as he slumped into the pilot's chair, he noticed that the call to the darkness--the pull--wasn't as strong. As if seeing the resilience of Rey, the light that she emanated even in her harsh conditions, buoyed his heart above the deep well of fear, loneliness, and despair that had plagued him for his whole life. Kylo reached a gloved hand into his pocket, gingerly removing the tattered doll. A faint smile played across his lips, and he set it down, giving it a place on a smooth plane of metal next to the controls.

He pushed his thoughts aside and focused on lifting up into the atmosphere. The lights of the controls flickered to life as he punched in coordinates and slowly took the ship up into the sky.

What was he doing with the doll? What did he think he was going to do, just march across the bond and hand the toy to her wrapped in a pretty bow? Did he think that a gesture like that would make up for all of the wrong in his life? Kylo sunk his head into his hands as the ship barreled towards the Finalizer. He would worry when he was back in his own quarters.

Hours later, Kylo paced the length of his room on the Finalizer. Should he just keep the doll? No, it felt wrong to keep something so intimate from her. He had to give it to her. If he had the guts. Anxiety roiled in his gut, twisting his thoughts into knots. He wrung his hands so violently that, without thinking, he had ripped a hole in the stitching of his gloves. Rey would think he was too weak. Too emotional. She couldn't possibly feel love towards him, and this gesture might just seem to her like he was digging up her past without her consent. What he would barely admit to the lightest part of himself was that he wanted to show her that he admired her bravery, that he marveled at her brilliance. That even in her deepest despair she had been a beacon.

Kylo sucked in a breath and sprang into action before he could change his mind. He closed his eyes and reached across the bond for her Force signature. The thread of their connection seemed pulled taut, leading him to her faster than any of his past attempts. Before he saw anything, he heard a heartbeat. Hers. A steady rhythm across the bond. Kylo tentatively opened his eyes.

Across the room from him, Rey slept soundly on her bunk. A standard-issue blanket was tangled around her legs and torso revealing a small stretch of pale waist. The bands holding her mousy brown hair in place had loosened, resulting in a section of hair draped over the right side of her face. Even from a couple feet away he could see strands of hair being blown upwards by her slight snores. Her dark lashes fluttered slightly, as if reacting to a dream. Taking all of her in was difficult. Overwhelming. Even as a completely sleepy mess, Rey had such a dramatic effect on him. Kylo's heart dropped out of his chest. He willed himself not to run across the small distance between them and take her sleeping form into his arms. She was light, she was radiant, she was beautiful even in the depths of slumber.

The doll in his hand felt heavy, reminding Kylo of his objective. As he padded across the room, he kept tabs on her Force signature, praying that she wouldn't wake. Rey being asleep made this easier. He wouldn't have to look into her eyes. Wouldn't have to show her the emotions on his face. He was afraid of what she would think. That she would turn him away, still disgusted by his actions.

Kylo pressed on. Inches away, he crouched down and could see the light freckles that dotted her nose. Mentally steadying himself, Kylo lifted the doll up to the bunk, laying it down beside her small hand. The memory of the sensation of her hand flashed in his mind: the brush of skin, the electricity he had felt. He wanted to feel that way for the rest of his life. But he didn't deserve it.

Stretching himself back to his full height, he looked down at the scavenger. Rey had cared about him. A swell of emotion hit him and instinct took over. He bent down, and his head hovered above hers as he pressed the faintest of kisses into her hair. 

Then he was gone.

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It had been a long day for Rey. She had thrown herself into last-minute work for the Resistance helping engineers fix and tweak equipment, sitting in on tactical meetings, and sparring with Finn. Exhausted, she tossed herself into her bed, shirking off her sweaty top. Too tired to remove the rest of her clothes and change, Rey's eyes fell shut and she was out.

In the middle of the night cycle, she sleepily shifted to her side, her hand hitting something lumpy in the process. Fear jolted through her. Was it Kylo? As her eyes opened and adjusted to the darkness around her she found he wasn't by her side. Rey tried to mask her own disappointment, but in her semi-conscious state it wasn't possible. She reached out for the small object, and brought it closer.

Her Rebel pilot.

Rey's mouth gaped open. She shot up in her bunk, inspecting the doll to verify that it was truly hers. Running her fingers over the rough stitching and material, tears welled in her eyes that threatened to run out onto her cheeks unbidden. This doll. This symbol that had represented hope. It hadn't been just a toy; it had been something that had taken her out of pain and placed her in a world of imagination. The tears fell now, dripping onto the doll in splotches. Rey clutched it close to her chest, grateful that a piece of her past, her resilience, was reunited with her. Minutes passed by as she cradled the doll, braced by the comfort it gave her. Then her thoughts fell back to the sudden appearance of the doll. How did it get here? Everyone on the base who knew her and where she was from had been present in the meeting today, making it impossible for them to have retrieved her treasure. That meant...

Ben.

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Back at it with another chapter and another episode of Ben is Back (For Now)! Will Rey be mad? Will Rey be sad? Will Rey be glad? Find out next time on Hannah Montana!

As always, let me know what you think! I always appreciate the love!