Why?

Chapter 1. Alex

Entering my bedroom, I stretched across my bed trying to get comfortable. I started watching YouTube videos of lesbian couples. I know it's not very healthy for me mainly because love should be the last thing I look for after my tragic experiences. But I guess I'm so infatuated with the idea of love that I can't help but to look for it even when I get hurt.  At least that's what my bestfriend tells me and she's usually right. Love is just who I am and I want to share myself with someone whose not afraid to be loved. I don't know why but where I'm from females are so damaged that a nice person like me could never get the girl of their dreams. Everyone just wants a asshole for some reason.

My phones rings, irritating me for interrupting my videos.

"What Kendra?!" I yelled into the phone.

"Hey girl, I just wanted to ask you are you okay because I know what happened between you and your old girl must have been rough on you." Bestfriend said.

"I'm fine and over it." I lied.

"I know you and I know that you're lying but it's okay. This is a good thing cause I've never liked the bit..."

I cut her off before she could finish. "Aye, mane! I know you didn't like her like that but don't disrespect her."

She got frustrated. "Trick, I can say whatever I want about her. She disrespected you and you still protecting her. Don't you get it? She doesn't want you to be her knight and shinny prince. She played you like a violin and yet you blame yourself for everything."

"Because it was my fault." I said as tears slowly started to build in my eyes.

"Look, bestfriend I really hate to see you hurt like this but you have to move on and start focusing on yourself. Besides, it wouldn't have worked out anyway since you're moving out of town."

"That's true." I sighed. "I know you're looking out for me and I appreciate that." Don't worry, I'll be back to my hoe self in no time." I said sarcastically.

"Yesss. That's what I want to hear!" Kendra laughed. "I'm going to call you later though, I have to go to class. Don't overdose on sadness. Bye!" she hung up.

That conversation left me with a lot of things on my mind. I couldn't help but to think of Alex. She took the love I had inside me and turned it bitter. Perhaps she got gold but I was left with coal. I feel so empty on the inside. I've been through some pretty tough break ups but this was on a total different level. Image finding your soulmate and they tell you everything you want to hear. Next you know, she's leaving you when you're the most vulnerable. Every promise made was broken. Well that's Alex for you.