Sandstorm [ACOTOR series side story]

Nineteen

I hate war.

At least with short skirmishes and battles, we're given time to recover and regain some semblance of mental stability, but during the war? I hardly find time to sleep, eat, even to wash off the blood that clings to me. My stomach has been a flurry of waves of nausea since my maiden battle. I retched thrice after it and I wouldn't have come out of my tent if I wasn't tasked with the duty of dealing with the aftermath of our battle. Burying and burning and so much more all under the watchful eyes of the vultures and flies surrounding us. Then the next battle I fought in we lost, and I still remember the utter sense of urgency when it came to winnowing all the wounded soldiers I could. To say I couldn't get to them all haunts me.

"Shamshir, form up in fifteen".

I nod at the male who spoke to me and get up from my seat on an empty barrel.

Before our fifteen minutes were up, everyone in my platoon was present. And it was because our leader didn't want us to be even a second late, or we'd waste his time. He was arrogant and pompous, but good at following orders, so that was no doubt how he wormed his way in. It was Jabari.

"Alright! I called everyone here because we just lost soldiers in our utter failure and defeat. So, who do you think has to pick up the slack of the missing soldiers in the right flank. That's right, us!" he sneered. No one said anything as we had all gotten used to him venting and screaming at us.

"So, you guys are going to prepare by doing 500 drills right now!" he yells.

A few males groan at the drills that will no doubt leave them limping out of this field. But we all obediently begin the first set of drills anyways because it's better than complaining and getting double the work. Sandals crunch in front of me as I am doing push-ups and I can tell by how high they wrap around the male's legs that it's Jabari.

"Did I forget to mention that since your female and therefore weaker than all of us here that you'll be doing an extra 500 drills?" he says in a casual tone but with a hint of an arrogant undercurrent. I could tell males were laughing along with Jabari at his at his "joke", really it was all very tasteless. Even when I stood between them and their deaths so many times, they still laugh and insult me.

"Oh-don't forget that you have a double patrol this evening, we got extra shifts from joining the right flank as well," Jabari says nonchalantly like it's even normal to give one soldier double shifts every day when there are over six dozen men under his command.

Prick.

It was reaching the five-hour mark of my patrol shift and to say I was exhausted was an understatement. I knew if I didn't get a good night's rest soon, I would be dangerous in any battle to come, for foes and friends.

Why are the males so sexist? How is it in a court known for their knowledge, they'd let stupid pride and arrogance dictate their decisions? If the females in the court could learn more, do more, cauldron-even allowed to fight, the productivity of our court would skyrocket. But, now is not the time to advocate for these rights, not when there is a war raging in every known place to fae. Though someday, someday we females will be representing our court for all to see and learn, that females have strength males would never understand.

"You know, if you never fight them, they'll just continue as is and never know when not to test your limits".

I don't jump at the sudden interruption of the night sounds I was accustomed to and that this male had managed to creep up on me. I turn slightly and take in the robust male standing to the left of me. He was tall and thick, with auburn colored hair that covered his eyes slightly, but those burning orbs couldn't be hidden during this gloomy night. They were a brown so reddish, that it reminded me of the blood-soaked earth after a battle. He leaned leisurely on a tree a few feet from me, with his arms crossed and no apparent weapons on him. But I knew it would be a mistake to assume that he was anything but deadly, he looked made for war. But, as it seemed all he was interested in was chatting me up, I chose to ignore him. If he knew what went on in camp daily, then he was obviously not a spy. Who would bother to watch my life and instead of laughing at it, try to get me to fight against it? Not a loyalist that's for sure.

"What? You're going to ignore me just because you didn't like what you heard?".

I didn't respond, and we spent the rest of my shift in silence since the male would not leave. I wasn't uncomfortable with his staring and interest in me, just inconvenienced. I didn't need a shadow following me on my rounds or alerting anyone to my presence. But thankfully, he only stayed leaning on his tree when I made my rounds. It was when a male came to relieve me that the male spoke again.

"My name is Kinsey. Come find me sometime" he said, then walked away.

I wasn't particularly in any state or mood to question him on it, so I just winnowed to my tent for some sleep.

****************************************

I guess I wasn't destined to sleep at all that night. 

When it was almost close to dawn and time for me to soon get up an infuriating horn sounded. 

Blarrrrrrrgh! Blarrrrrrgh! Blaaaaaarrrrrrrggghh!

Something was happening in camp for the bell to be going off. And I soon found out the next moment.

"The Loyalists are forming up on the plains!"

That had me speed dressing in my standard armor altered for me and braiding my hair back as Shala showed me a long time ago. I strapped on all my weapons and my shield to my back next to a quiver of arrows. The last step was to put on my helmet that fit snugly on my head, especially with the braid. 

Better to keep it on my head. Better to keep my head.