Close Enemies || A Dramione Love Story

Chapter 9 ~ Shout-out To My Ex

Shout-out to my ex

You're really quite the man

You made me heartbreak and that made me who I am

Here's to my ex

Hey look at me now

Well I'm all the way up, I swear you'll never bring me down

                                                                                                            - Shout-out to my ex - Little Mix

The news that Ron and I had begun dating spread like wildfire. I really wished it hadn't because it meant that Draco would have probably figured out by now. I had learned to move on and I'm sure that Draco would appreciate it. Right? He knew that we couldn't be together. And so did I. Besides, I bet he only saw me as an experimental friend. Although I felt nothing when I kissed Ron. No sparkler effect, no electricity, no jitters or fear that my intestines may fall out. Nothing like the passionate moments I had shared with Draco. Maybe I had just adapted to kissing and didn't get nervous anymore. That had to be it. The following morning, I made no attempt to beautify my very average canvas. I simply went down to breakfast and avoided all eye contact with the Slytherin table. I could feel Blaise and Clarice looking at me confusedly and at once I knew my face was flushed. I hastily peeped over to the other side of the hall and couldn't see Draco. Why had he missed breakfast two days in a row. Did he know about me and Ron? He must do...

Sadly, I joined Ron and Harry. I looked at Ron as affectionately as possible before leaning down and pecking his cheek. He put his arm around my waist, not high like Draco, but incredibly close to my knicker line. Instead of moving, I just shifted closer to him, when the thought struck me,

'Maybe Draco put his arm higher because he didn't actually like me like THAT,'

I nodded as if trying to shake the thought from my head. As much as I was enjoying dating Ron, I still hated the bitter thought of Draco only wanting me as a friend.  But I didn't like Ron's hands getting increasingly lower on my body and if this is what having a boyfriend was like, I guess I didn't want one. Harry looked at us, smiling weakly. I suppose he feels sorry for last night. Together, we walked up to Charms. WITH SLYTHERIN! I had completely forgotten and was not looking forward to it. I suddenly found myself feeling shaky and there was a cool sheen of sweat on my face. We all walked up, and I clenched my fists as I walked past Blaise and Clarice. They looked at eachother questioningly and I felt horrible. I knew what it was like to lose a friend and to be ignored. But I had to maintain my pride with the other gryffindors. I was normal and studious, not a bitch. Then why was I acting like one? I was the last person that anyone would associate with a love triangle. As we walked up the stairs, i felt a million eyes looking down at mine and Ron's entwined hands. He looked rather smug but now, I was seriously considering skiving off charms. I finally made the decision to bunk off and tell Harry and Ron that I was feeling ill. Ron kissed my hand roughly and I tried my best to swallow the bile rising in my throat.  I could not hard to confront my three Slytherin friends, let's not forget about LAVENDER. I stormed to the curtain that concealed a beautiful stained glass window. I often retreated to this precise location when I could just dwell upon all my problems, like Ron and my defense against the dark arts final and my relationship with Draco. And then, I was welcomed to  a sight that unnerved me, sent chills down my spine, like I had been drenched with cold ice. Something that broke my heart, but not just once as the pain repeated over and over again.

It was Draco. And he was not alone. He was locking lips with non other than Pansy Parkinson. He said he hated her. And at once I felt tears brim in my eyes. Her legs were wrapped around his torso and his hands were clamped around her thighs. He looked at her like he had never looked at me. With lust and infatuation and hidden beneath all of that was love. It was at that moment when I realised that I was quite simply not good enough for him or Ron or anyone. As if the situation wasnt bad enough, Draco spat at me, 

"Oh look it's the mudblood," he looked at me with pure venom, merciless "Come on, princess,". With that's the two of them went to Charms without sparing me a mere look. The second they left, I realized how I felt about Draco. How much I had learned to love him throughout the few months that I had known him. And all he had been doing was playing with the strings of my heart. I should have known that all he had ever was, all he ever could be was a cold blooded, evil racist. I tucked my knees up to my chest and hugged them, when the curtain was pulled open. For a millisecond, I thought, maybe even hoped that it was Draco, perhaps with an explanation of the situation. But I was relieved to find Ginny, looking absolutely thrilled about something. She squealed when she saw me before exclaiming,

"Hermione? It was Draco, wasn't it?". How did she know me so well? I gave her a somewhat convincing smile and nodded. She wrapped her arms around me before saying,

"Did he cheat on you?"

Nodding, I answered her,

"Well, technically he wasn't ever da - dating me in the first place. I was a fool to think that he would ever want me. And I did sort of kiss your brother the other day. And I agreed to go out with him," I finished, choking back a sob. Suddenly, I went into full elaboration of the story, telling her about how Draco had made me feel over the past months, how he had kissed me under the fireworks on New Years Day, how he had shown me affection like nobody else, how I had dated Ron to forget about Draco, how he said he hated Parkinson. I realised how confused and ditzy I sounded so i looked down to hide my abashed face.

I could read the disgust on her face like a muggle Victorian literature novel. She tried her very best to disguise whatever she was feeling though, responding,

"I know you never had feelings for Ron," she answered "Do you perhaps think that Draco made out with Parkinson to make you jealous?"

"No. He looked like he didn't want to be caught with her," I added indignantly "And besides, even if he was trying to make me jealous, it didn't work," 

"You're just in denial. That's the first stage of a relationship. Come on Hermione - you told me that," she added her expression softening. I vividly remember the day when I gave Ginny this piece of advice. She was trying to hide the devastation in her face when she caught Ron teasing Harry about his first kiss with Cho. 

"Ginny, I never want to be seen by Draco or Clarice or Blaise ever again," I muttered, wiping tears from my eyes

"Hermione. There has to be an explanation for this. By the sounds of it, Draco adores you. And so do Clarice and Blaise. I'd advise you break up with my brother in the nicest way possible, and try to win Draco back,"

"How?" I asked "He probably hates me,"

"Seduction?" she suggested with a grin

"Now way! Seriously Ginny! What if he doesn't want me? What if I'm just another one of his playgirls? I don't wanna seem desperate!" I answered, mortified

"Hermione... I've never been in love. But if I know one thing it's that Draco Malfoy is head over heels infatuated with you," she replied, a sombre expression on her face. "Lets forget about boys and heartbreak and shit.... Hermione do you like firewhisky?" she added with a smirk.

"We're both underage," I said, shaking my head at my best friend "And it's only 9 o'clock in the morning,"

"Oh be a rebel for once in your life, Hermione," she said before leading me up to the dormitory.

She went into one of many trunks under her bed and pulled out a crate of different types of wine and liquor and beer. If I wasn't so done with life, I would have scolded her, definitely questioned how all that liquor had gotten into her possession. But today, I just slumped down on the bed, pulled out a nice looking bottle of firewhisky and drained half of it. It burned my throat but I mildly enjoyed the way it clouded my thoughts. The way it made me forget about Draco and Ronald and death eaters and all the crap in the daily prophet. I found myself giggling giddily. It felt good. And it was on that day I got drunk for the first time. It was that day I stepped out of Hermione Granger's skin and became someone else. I won't go into the little details..