'We'

Chapter Five

Erik sucked gently on the rim of the cup. It dawned on him how often he had done so in the last few days. So much had happened, he could hardly remember most of it. There was no tea, and he simply raised the paper to his lips in an attempt to occupy his brain.

Seb sat opposite him, staring at his friend in silence. Erik was too focused to notice but would have struggled to make eye contact regardless.

"So."

Erik looked up at the word, his black hair flopping into his face. He placed the cup down with a small thump, raising his hand to wipe away the hair.

"Sorry." Erik wasn't all too sure what he was apologizing for, but it was a habit he had difficulty breaking. Seb's eyes conveyed a mixture of humour and sympathy, and his friend looked away. "What?"

"So your friend is… nice."

"He's great, yeah." Erik's voice was clipped, defensive. He glanced over his shoulder at Felix, who was serving a woman with a smile. They made eye contact for a moment, and the expression on the barista's face got brighter. Erik looked away.

Seb was still staring at him, that same awful look on his face. The black-haired man averted his gaze to the empty cup, grabbing it to suck on the rim again.

"How's your coffee?" he muttered around the paper, trying to change the subject to something, anything, other than his condescending silence. Seb did not reply, and Erik slunk further down into his chair. He had no idea what had got him into this slump so suddenly, but now he just wanted to head home.

That was a lie, however, and he knew it. Felix was his friend, not Seb's. He wanted them to get along, yes, but he didn't like the way that Felix had looked at him. He didn't like the way they had shaken hands. Erik's own hands twitched, itching for contact. He and Seb had never had the most physical of friendships. At most, they would playfully punch each other when they got annoying. Why did he so desperately want a different kind of friendship with Felix?

"How long have you known him?" Seb asked, breaking the void that had formed between them. Erik looked up, regaining some of his composure.

"A couple days."

"Oh," Seb responded, the inflexion of his voice rising in a teasing way. "It seems like you've known each other for years."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Erik snapped.

"No need to get all defensive. I don't swing that way."

Erik smiled, once more sucking on the paper cup. With a physical flinch, he realised what Seb had said.

"What?" he exclaimed, voice cracking slightly with surprise. Seb had just taken a swig of coffee, and now he struggled to keep it in his mouth around the burst of laughter. He swallowed, and the sound was finally released from his lips. As the seconds dragged on, Erik's expression got darker.

"I'm not gay. We're friends."

Seb was now choking on his own saliva, eyes streaming with tears.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" he stammered between outbreaks, "but that expression is priceless!"

"You're just jealous I have other friends."

Erik crossed his arms over his chest, having won the argument. He waited patiently for Seb to calm down, and they made eye contact. Seb took an intake of breath, still recovering.

"You weren't joking? You don't have a thing for him?"

"No."

"Could've fooled me."

Smiling, Seb took the last sip of his coffee. Erik's face was red, a mixture of anger and embarrassment. He would not break eye contact with his friend, determined to make him feel uncomfortable. Seb let out a deep sigh as he realised.

"Alright. I get it. I won't mention it again."

Erik smiled, satisfied.

"Good-"

"You might want to tell Felix that, though. He's been staring at you since we sat down."

Erik spun in his chair, irritating the spot in his neck he had clicker earlier. He raised a hand to it again, rubbing the ache. The barista was serving another customer, but as Erik turned he looked up to make eye contact, smiling. It was only a moment before frolicking returned to his work, but it was long enough to cause the other man to avert his gaze, face still red. He turned back to Seb.

"Is he not allowed to look at me?" Erik was defensive again, crossing his arms over his chest. Seb smiled.

"Out break's almost over. We should head back."

The pair stood, grabbing their empty drinks and carrying them over to the bin. Seb took a step towards the door but Erik hesitated, wanting to say goodbye to his friend. Seb seemed not to have noticed, and the other man took his chance, turning back towards the counter.

He walked over, waiting patiently until Felix had finished serving the man who had just ordered. He turned to Erik, smiling brightly. The older man was painfully aware that the next customer was waiting.

"You leaving?"

"My lunch break's over," Erik replied, returning the smile. Something suddenly flashed in his brain.

'He's been staring at you since we sat down.'

Erik blinked momentarily, Seb's words clouding his mind. He had not removed his gaze from Felix, and again he was over-aware of the man standing, waiting to order his drink.

"Were you staring at me?" he ventured quietly, and Felix beamed.

"Of course. I'll call you later."

Erik nodded and turned back to the exit. His face was red again, and he wondered why. Seb was waiting patiently at the door for him, too good a friend to mention what was in both of their minds again. Erik smiled at him.

"I'm ready. Sorry."

The walk back to the office was once more made in comfortable silence, the conflict from earlier completely forgotten. They both gazed at them as they walked, taking in the city. It wasn't long before a foreboding grey building loomed before they paused outside, taking out their cards to sign back in.

"I'll see ya tomorrow," Seb insisted once the pair were back inside. Erik nodded, and the friends in silence as they so often did. The black-haired man was reminded that he didn't want to leave Felix silently. Seb's words had been playing on his mind since they and left the coffee shop.

More than he would like to admit to himself, actually. Felix had been staring at him. Why had he become flustered when he had noticed? He found it strange that he had only noticed when it had been pointed out to him.

He pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He wholeheartedly believed what he had told Seb - that he wanted nothing more than to be friends with Felix. He could admit that their friendship had formed quickly, but why was that so peculiar? They got along. Was that a crime?

With a jolt, Erik realised he was at the door to his office. The prison cell seemed even less welcoming than it had earlier after the break. He signed, walking over to the desk.

Erik sat silently for a moment, still thinking of Felix. Words circulated around his head, a mixture of Seb's, Felix's and his own. One phrase stung the strongest - 'of course'. Felix had admitted to staring at Erik as if it were all he was born to do. To just… look. Erik shivered.

He clicked the tablet on, preparing to start work again. 'Could've fooled me.' Seb's voice was loud in his head, and it took all his effort to push it away. He shut his eyes, clearing his mind.

Picking up the papers, Erik set to work. His friends' handshake appeared in his mind's eye, and he heaved an angry sigh. He needed to concentrate. He had trouble working enough as it was, without having Felix playing on his mind.

Maybe it wasn't the best idea to visit Felix's coffee shop when he should be working.