'We'

Chapter Nineteen

"You know, for someone with a degree in medicine, you're really bad at overdosing."

Rosa had both her feet up on the chair next to her, arms crossed over her chest as she leaned back against the wall. Opposite her, on the edge of the bed, Erik still clung to the man, face pressed into his shoulder.

"Do you want me to apologize?" Felix replied, raising an eyebrow at his friend over Erik's shoulder. Rosa gave a meaningful glance at the taller man's back, one that Felix could not misinterpret. He lowered his gaze. If Rosa had not known the man so well she would have missed the gesture of regret.

Pushing Erik back slightly, Felix gazed gently into his green irises. The colour caught his attention, and he was momentarily distracted. Before he could talk a pain racked his stomach, and he was forced to curl forward. Erik reached for his shoulder to support him.

"Sorry," Felix sighed as he straightened his spine, eyes closed as he braced the pain. Erik retracted his hands carefully. The brown-haired man looked up at Erik. "Honestly. I'm sorry for everything." Erik dropped his gaze, glancing quickly across as Rosa.

"Don't worry. She's already told me how much of a dick you are. Repeatedly."

Felix spin to face his friend, his eyebrows knitted together in frustration. She stuck her tongue out at him, and he mirrored her after a few seconds.

"Can I ever make it up to you?" Felix asked slowly, turning to face Erik with a gaze that portrayed nothing but seriousness. "For… putting you through this."

"Grow a ponytail," Erik insisted without a moment's hesitation, and Felix couldn't help but laugh.

"Done."

Rosa stood slowly from her chair, and the two men removed their gazes from the other to watch her. She looked between them, her gaze finally settling on Felix.

"I'll give you some time alone," she insisted, and her friend nodded at her thankfully. The men watched her leave, before once more turning to stare at the other.

"I wish I had noticed sooner," Erik insisted, casting his eyes down to Felix's arms. At the scars that he should have seen there. It wasn't as if he hadn't had the opportunity to do so. The hands moved, slowly, grabbing onto Erik's own.

"It wasn't your place to notice. I should have… trusted me more."

"What do you mean 'yourself'?"

"I…" Felix began but bit his lip to silence himself. "Have a lot of…"

"Take your time," Erik insisted, squeezing his hands slightly. Felix let a smile reach his lips. Instead of continuing, he leant forward and kissed Erik. The man hesitated for only a moment before he accepted.

"Trust issues," Felix breathed, breaking them apart silently. "And a control complex. I like to feel…" a pause punctuated his sentence again. "To make up for my leg."

Erik nodded, taking in the man before him. Felix looked back at him with huge eyes, pausing as if he expected the other man to say something. When he did not, Felix finally opened his mouth.

"I'm sorry."

"You've had some messed up things happen to you," Erik commented, not breaking eye-contact with the man before him. His gaze took in everything. "But we can get through this if only you'll begin to trust me."

Felix stared up at Erik as if he had not seen a man before, as if this was something complicated and new that he has not expected to encounter. His eyes darted away quickly as doubt flashed through his mind again - like it always had. He screwed his eyes shut, pushing it away.

"'We'? That's funny. No-one's ever included me in a 'we' before."

Erik hardly knew how to react, and froze in place. His eyes remained locked with Felix's, and a complicated expression found its way into his face. His opinion of Felix had changed so much.

"When you get out of here," he continued, eyes darting around the place, "I'm bringing you back to my place. I don't want to leave you on your own in this state."

"Is that an offer?" Felix remarked, raising an eyebrow, but Erik gazed him a glare. "You don't need to do that."

"I do," he replied, his gaze intense. "Because I don't want to lose you again."

Felix looked down, clearly uncertain.

"I don't know why you'd consider... Forgiving me," the man stuttered, flustered by Erik's words. "I can't promise to mess things up again."

"And I can't promise either," the taller man responded, standing from his seat on the bed. "But that isn't something anyone can promise."

"If you keep insisting I'll stop trying to convince you otherwise," Felix declared honestly, and Erik blinked slowly.

"Then I guess it's settled."

The taller man leaned over the bed, still standing, to kiss Felix once more. Just as their lips were about to touch there was a click in the direction of the door. Erik jumped backwards.

"Hello. I heard he'd woken up," the doctor insisted as he entered, casting a sideways glance at Erik. The man blushed intently.

Erik took a few steps backwards, watching the doctor talk to Felix with mild interest. His mind remained partly in other places. Is this what he really wanted? As he watched Felix's expression of determination he finally became sure.

Rosa opened the door beside him, following the doctor into the room. She stood silently by Erik's side, watching her friend with strange interest. She let out a little noise of contempt, lowering her voice so as not to interrupt the doctor's words.

"What do you think, then?" she asked.

"About what?" Erik questioned back, imitating her lowered volume.

"How long it will last. How long he'll be able to go before he drops again."

Erik kept his eyes on the man, watching the interaction. Every so often Felix looked back at him too, smiling over at the taller man.

"I think he'll be alright," Erik insisted gently. "I think we'll be okay."

Erik wasn't sure how long the doctor had talked to Felix for. He and Rosa had migrated back to the chairs, occasionally talking in hushed whispers, by the time he took a step away from the hospital bed.

"I suggest you go home. Visiting time is over."

Rosa nodded gently, standing up. After a moment's hesitation, Erik did the same. His gaze remained fixed on Felix, who looked exhausted himself. He watched Erik blankly.

"I'll be back tomorrow," he insisted, ignoring the blush that found its way to his face at such a public announcement. Felix blinked in agreement.

The doctor followed Erik and Rosa out silently, shutting the door behind him. The woman began to walk on, before realising Erik had not followed her. She turned to watch him.

"Will he be alright?" The taller man asked his voice a hoarse whisper. The doctor hesitated a moment.

"He should be. I suggest you and his girlfriend go home and get some rest. He won't appreciate you being too tired to visit him in the morning."

"She's not his... I'm..." Erik closed his eyes, thinking better of arguing about something that didn't really matter. What would change if this doctor knew? "Yeah. Right. Thanks."

He walked up to Rosa, who had been watching him with an interesting face. She smiled at Erik warmly, sorrow in her eyes. He was confused by her pause, eyebrows knitted. She finally turned around to the direction Erik had approached from.

"Thanks," Rosa called out to the doctor, who had already started to leave in the opposite direction. "I and his boyfriend will be back tomorrow."

Erik smiled at her, and the pair walked off in a strangely happy silence.