Guilt; That's All This Is

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We followed the EMTs directions. As soon as we arrived we went to door three where a very nice young woman told us Kevin had been wheeled in to immedite surgery and would be there for a few hours.

She led us through a maze of halls to a brightly colored waiting room. "I can always give you a call when he is out." She said, noticing the exhaustion on all our faces.

"We will wait." Evan spoke up. "Just let us know when he's out please."

"No problem." She smiled. "Do you mind if I ask what happened? He looked pretty beat up."

"He fell off the stage." Manny told her.

"We are a band." I elaborated. "He slipped and fell from the stage to the floor." My voice shook as I spoke.

"I'm sorry to hear that." She covered her mouth. "I'm so sorry. I will keep you updated of course." She smiled again before heading back into the maze of the hospital.

"I didn't know it happened until I saw well, nobody." Manny sighed.

"It took me a moment to even comprehend it." Evan admitted.

I was silent. It's not that I didn't want to speak, but more so that I couldn't. I had watched Kevin get closer to the cord and I had suspected he would fall. Yet I went on playing and let it happen. It's my fault.

"You alright man?" Manny hit my back with little force.

"Ya just," I coughed. "worried."

"Understandable." Evan nodded. "Wake me up when you hear something." He crossed his arms behind his head and leaned back.

"Will do." Manny sighed and took out his phone. "Well they all know." He held out his phone to me. Twitter was exploding with notifications to Kevin. "Looks like nobody knows where he is though."

"Well we passed five hospitals on the way here." Evan spoke with his eyes closed. "Probably knew he would be bombarded otherwise."

"Look at this one. 'Kevin is broken' seriously?"

I rolled my eyes. There was a gift shop just around the corner and I decided to check it out, rather than be even more annoyed or worried by fans. The store was mostly pink and blue with trinkets to celebrate the birth of new children. Along the back however was a line of 'get well soon' presents. I picked up a light brown bear wearing a red hoodie that said "HUGS". It reminded me of Kevin. Due to visiting hours not being until 8 am the gift shop had no employees. I took the bear and layed a ten on the counter before returning to Manny and Evan.

Seconds turned into minutes, minutes turned into hours, and hours turned into an endless night. We arrived shortly after 10, and it wasn't until 2:30 that the nurse returned to the waiting room.

"Kevin is out of his first surgery." She told us.

"First?" Manny asked. "How many is he having?"

"He is having three."

"What for?" I asked with slightly too much panic in my voice.

"He just had his jaw wired shut, they plan on letting him rest for a while before fixing his ankle and a few broken ribs of his." She smiled. "The jaw was the worst and the longest surgery."

"When can we see him?" I asked.

"He is heavily sedated and completely out of it." She handed me a clipboard. "Please fill this out. You may see him once he is in a room. I'll be back for the papers in a bit." She turned and left again.

The papers asked questions about Kevin's name, age, hometown, past medical problems and various other off the wall questions that I could surprisingly answer.

Around four, Manny had passed out and I was the only one left. The nurse had came by for the paperwork and told me that Kevin was entering his last surgery and would be placed in a room around six. I yawned and nodded as she walked off. This was definitely going to be a long night and morning.

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