The Misadventures of Captain Joe and His Band of Crazies

Cocktopus (Part 2)

3rd Person POV continued:

Shelby face palms, sighing dramatically as Bella preens up at Joe. He pinches the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger, muttering an "I'm getting too old for this shit." With a round of giggles, the costume hunt began. Ellison grabbed stockings and heels for her sexy nurse costume, then hung back with Joe as Lexi and Bella scoured the store excitedly, tugging Shelby along with them. "I'm not wearing that!" Shelby yelled as Bella held a pink glittery princess outfit up for inspection. "Why not?!" Bella huffed. "It's so sparkly!" She sighed wistfully. "Bella, no." Shelby rolled her eyes. "Fine." Bella pouted for about three seconds before her eyes lit up.

Bella's POV:

"Daddy! Help!" I squealed. I heard the thunder of Joe's big boots before I saw him. "You alright Princess?" He asked. I nodded dreamily and pointed up behind him. He turned and looked, then chuckled. "You yelled for help because you couldn't reach the sparkly fairy costume?" He asked incredulously. "Are you honestly surprised?" Elli snorted. Joe shook his head and reached up, grabbing my size. He handed it to me and I squealed excitedly. About that time, Lexi came skidding around the corner. "Got it! Let's DO this!" She exclaimed with a fist pump. "So we all set?" Elli asked. The girls all eyed each other. "Papa's turn!" They all exclaimed simultaneously. Joe took a deep breath. "Look, he wants to roll his eyes..." I whispered. "Eeeep!" I yelped and jumped forward, rubbing my behind where Papa popped me. Shelby snorted. "Go ahead... Gloat some more Bella..." she said with a smirk.

Lexi's POV:

I laughed as Bella kept rubbing her ass. For a big dude, Joe was fast as hell. We scoured the store, looking for something that would suit Papa. "Alien, firefighter, Doctor, gangster..." Elli listed the costume choices. "Stripper..." Bella purred and rubbed up against Joe, much like a cat. "Don't be gross, oh hey! Look, a pirate hat. Arrrrrgghhh!" Shelby laughed. "Ahoy Maties! I am Captain Jack Sparrow!" She imitated a pirate's accent, and all the girls stopped immediately. "Yes!" They shouted. Bella scrambled out of Papa's grasp and rifled through the rack, grabbing the last available pirate's costume in Joe's size. "No." He deadpanned. "Oh come on, bro. If I gotta dress up, you do too." Shelby huffed. Joe glared. "You have to wear it Papa." "Yeah it's perfect!" Ellison and I tried to convince him. The big man crossed his arms over his chest and planted his feet. Damn it. I nudged Bella with an elbow. "Do it. Make it happen." I whispered. Shelby cringed and covered her eyes. Elli grinned conspiratorially. Bella sashayed up to Joe, calmly reaching up with her arms. "Up please." She said innocently. "I'm not wearing that." Joe growled as he reached down and scooped the small redhead up into his arms. "Daddy?" She purred, tugging on his beard. "Yes princess?" His glare softened immediately. Bella batted her eyes and cuddled in close. "Please?" She asked softly. Joe sighed. "Fine. I'll wear the damn pirate costume." He groaned before setting her down. Bella walked back towards us. "Nailed it!" I high fived her.

Joe's POV: (back in the cabins)

A fucking pirate. I'm dressed like a fucking pirate. Why? Because the princess batted those eyes at me. Christ, my wife is entirely too spoiled. I sighed and shook my head. "Hang in there Papa, we'll behave..." Ellison tried to reassure me. I raised an eyebrow at her. "Well.. we'll try.." Lexi snorted. "Mostly.." Shelby piped up. "Where the hell is the princ-fuck me..." I stopped mid-sentence and growled low in my throat. "Not that I'm complaining, but what would you call this get-up you got on little girl?" I rumbled. "I'm an arsonist fairy, Daddy. Duh!" She huffed and sashayed over to us. Her heels put her around 5'4", still the shortest of the bunch. I sat on the end of the bed as she climbed in my lap. All of a sudden Lexi, Elli, and Shelby all started talking at once. Loud, random gibberish. About that time Bella's hand shot up towards my face. "Hell no! Hell no! I draw the line at eyeliner. Damn it!" I fussed, trying to rein in my wife. I stood to be out of her reach, but she kicked off those killer heels, planted one foot on the bed for leverage, and leaped off. She wrapped around me with all her limbs trying to apply eyeliner. "Goddamn it, when did you turn into a fucking octopus?!" I growled. Growling in frustration, I grabbed the first limb I could, an ankle, and bodily tossed her little ass on the bed. "Sit." I growled when she went to stand. Lexi, Elli, and Bella all sat still. "Shelby don't even think about it." I warned as she tried to come up behind me.

Shelby's POV: (at the costume party)

Here we are, the misfit crew. Elli, the sexy nurse, Lexi, the French maid, Bella, the fucking arsonist fairy, and me, the death rocker. Joe lead us in, in full pirate garb. Eyeliner included. Bella was already half drunk, and Lexi wasn't far behind her. Absentmindedly, I twirled a pair of handcuffs around my finger, my costume had several pairs. "Bella, no!" I heard Joe chastise the wild red head. I turned around in time to see him stop her before she was able to steal a pair of handcuffs from my costume. "Mine." I glared with a grin. She huffed. "Oh my God!" I smacked everyone and pointed. Brantley was standing across the room with PJ, talking with their backs to us. "Alright ladies, just like we rehearsed." Elli rubbed her hands together. "Nice and easy." Lexi cracked her knuckles. "Covert snatch and grab." Bella chuckled darkly and toyed with a zippo lighter. Before Joe could ask us anything, we all took off in different directions.

Joe's POV:
Son of a bitch! Here we go again. They scattered in all different directions, crouching low and making their way through the crowd. I had an advantage though, no one wants to block your path when you're 6'6" and 240lbs. I parted the crowd easily, and stormed straight towards Brantley and PJ, hoping to intercept him. "B!" I rumbled when I got close. "Joe! What's goin in brother? Oh man, that outfit is Bella's handiwork ain't it?" He chuckled. I snarled. "Speaking off the little hellcat, where's the crew?" PJ asked. "Heads up, my girls are planning a hostile takeover." I warned. "Seriously, how much trouble could they cause? It's 4 women!" PJ snorted. "You lose'em in the crowd?" Brantley asked looking around. I nodded. "They split up and scattered." I growled. "Are you ducking kidding me?!" PJ exclaimed just as my girls rounded on Brantley. "Oh shit!" He laughed and tried to hang on to something as they swarmed him. PJ started prying them off one by one. Elli, then Lexi, he grabbed Bella and she hissed at him like a pissed off cat. "No one touches me but Daddy!" She snarled and pranced over to my side. Last was Shelby. Who was in the process of trying to cuff Brantley. "Fucking bear sized hands!" She cursed when the cuffs wouldn't fit on his wrists. PJ grabbed her and she head butted him in the face. Struggling to hold on to her, she squirmed and kicked and bit until he finally let go. "You fucking cock-sucking octopus! Let go!" She growled. "What did you call me?!" PJ asked incredulously. "You heard me you fucking cocktopus!" She snapped her teeth at him. He moved to step towards her and all four of the girls readied themselves, advancing towards him slowly. I let out an ear piercing whistle, and all my girls froze. "But Papaaa!!!" They whined simultaneously. Brantley cracked up laughing from his position on the floor.