Hey, I'm Your Dad (Pierce the Veil Fanfiction)

Pussies

The movie recieved many girly screams from the guys I recieved some very nasty threats from them.

"I swear to god If you ever make us watch something like that again, I will fucking leave you in the street in a bag of angry cats and chili  powder." Tony pointed his finger at me and glared darkly.

"You guys are scaredy cats. Oh my god." I swear my eyes literally rolled right out of my head.

Throughout the movie, they all jumped and screamed shit. Jaime was practically crying the entire time, while burying his head into Vic's chest.

Ew.

I laughed at all of them.

And being the grown ass men they are, they all slept over.

They all slept on the floor in the living room, huddled together in fear of the girl. They sent me off to get blankets and pillows for them, seeing as I was the only one unfazed by the horror flick.

When they all got settled, I left and said I was going to bed.

"I hope she comes for you." Señor Perry cursed me.

"Love you too, Tony."

I walked back to my room and sat on my bed.

Hmmmmm. What should I do now?

Ooooo I know! How bout a nice little prank?

I walked into the bathroom and pulled out a bunch of chemicals from under the sink. I also grabbed the conditioner from the shower and a bowl.

I've dyed my hair using home solutions before and it looks like I have all the shit I need here.

(A/N please dont make your own hair dye. it will look fucking shitty)

I started mixing a bunch of shit together, making a temporary, black hair dye. I started applying it to my blonde hair, watching it change colors.

I waited for about 20 minutes and started to wash it out, as quietly as possible, in hopes of not pulling any of the guys' attention or possibly waking any of them up.

All of the mix was out of my hair, leaving it stained black.

I let it dry before running my straightener through it and teasing it a bit to make it look messy.

I went back into my room and opened up my suitcase, pulling out my white church dress.

It looked more like a nightgown that a dress to be honest.

I also pulled out a pair of scissors (yes, I packed my scissors), and my temporary,  one-wash hair color. It was from my red phase so it worked perfectly.

I cut slits in the dress and made holes with the scissors, making it look torn up and old, then I splattered the hair shit on it and made a couple of bloody-looking handprints in random spots.

Cool.

I let the 'blood' dry and went back into the bathroom. I went through my large collection of make up, looking for my old 'oh I'm Irish and apparently Irish genes rule out Mexican genes so I don't tan so I use really fucking light foundation' foundation.

It was from a while ago, so I had enough time to somewhat get darker.

I put it all over my face and neck, smearing in a bit of eyeliner under my eyes. I was looking the part now, man.

I grabbed the hair colour and flicked a bit onto my cheeks and forehead.

Eh.

I added a smudged fingerprint to my face.

Better.

I went back into my bedroom. Damn, I was getting fit from all of this room changing.

I put on the dress and grabbed my computer.

I creeped into the living room to see all of the guys cuddling in fear.

Awwwh. Wow. You're amazing.

I mentally complemented my genius mind.

I set up my computer so that the screen emitted no light and so the camera was on and facing the guys. I pressed record.

I ran over and grabbed the remote off of the tv stand and jumped behind the couch.

I pressed the play button and the television screen played the static from the movie.

All of the guys jumped and woke up.

"Vic, you said it wasn't real!"

"Holy shit!"

"Ohmygod we're all gonna die. Holy shit."

"Hey it's okay guys." Vic stood up, leaving the group of shaking men. He pressed the 'off' button on the tv.

"See? It was just a malfunction of some shit."

He walked over and sat down with the guys again.

I pushed the power button again. That static played. The guys turned into girls.

Vic got up and turned the tv off, and to be extra sure, unplugged the cord from the wall.

All of the guys were now standing in a huddle, looking around with wise eyes. Vic joined them, trying to provide words of comfort or some shit.

Me, being the badass ninja I am, ducked behind the other couch and behind the side table to the outlet, and plugged the tv cord back in, and made my way back to my hiding spot. I hit the power on the tv and the screen turned on again.

This time all of the guys screamed.

I decided that it was time for me to give myself up.

I flipped my hair over my head, so that it was in my face and jumped over the couch, facing the backs of the group of idiots who were staring at the tv in fear.

I took a step towards them with a limp and reached out my arms for Jaime's neck.

Vic turned around and saw me, pointing a finger at me, unable to speak.

The rest of the guys turned to face me and let out terrified screams.

Man, I really hope the neighbours don't call the police or some shit.

I took another step towards the frozen porcupine that was Jaime.

Then they all lost their shit, running out of the room while emitting the highest pitched screams they could muster.

I fell to the ground in laugher, clutching my sides. I was gasping for air.

"GODDAMN IT, DANI! I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!!!!!!"

I looked up to see Tony staring at me, his face redder than a tomato.

The rest of the guys slowly walked back into the room, their faces getting red too.

I stood up, brushing off imaginary dust from my 'bloody' dress.

I brushed my hair out of my face and looked at all of them with the most serious expression I could possibly make.

"I have concluded my studies, and based on substantial evidence I have collected, I have determined that you are all pussies."

I walked towards my room, swiftly picking my laptop on my way out.