I'm glad you think I don't need them. And that they sucked as friends anyways. I'm glad you think I'm able to make great new friends and that they are more important to my old ones. I'm glad you think I'm just miserable or grumpy and that there couldn't possibly be anything wrong with me. I'm glad you think I'm happy.
But the truth is? I miss them. Every single day. I think about them a whole fucking lot and it fucking hurts that I've lost them. It doesn't matter if they sucked to you. They did a whole lot more than you know for me. And they took care of me. They loved me. They didn't care when I had bad grades. They helped. They gave me courage to start every day and they reminded me of why I tried. They didn't always know why I was sad, but it didn't matter. They did everything they could to make me smile and laugh and be ok. They took care of me when I wasn't ok. And i miss them a whole fucking lot. I can't just meet new people and it be the same. No one is quite like them.
And it sucks they don't care. They don't bother to message me or check in. But maybe it was my fault for switching schools. None of you care how much it hurts and just how upset I am. You just see the grumpy miserable girl who constantly wants to be texted because she can't take her own thoughts or who is nasty to everyone and "overreacts" when she finally is saying how she feels. Well fuck you. And don't you dare say you care or love me when I finally lose my mind because I can't do it anymore.
