Where have you been?

Chapter Four

I walked up to him and noticed how his eyes wandered over me, how he licked his lips before he caught himself. He smirked at me and held open the door. We didn't say a word to each other as we were seated and handed a menu.

"So, what is it that you needed to discuss with me?"

"Look, there's an issue that's come up and I need your help." He laughed and looked away.

"Now you need my help, huh? Now I'm suddenly important enough for you to need, huh?" I knew he was pissed, I knew he wasn't going to make this easy for me, not at all, not with what he thinks I did.

"I didn't know my father told you those things, Ronnie, but he lied. That's not what happened. Justin and I are getting married, we went to get the license--"

"Wait, what does this have to with me exactly? I could give a shit less what you're doing." I bit my lip and shook my head.

"If you'd let me finish and I would tell you. It does have to do with you because when we tried to get it.... They told me you and I are still married!"

His eyes shot to mine and his jaw dropped opened. He sat up more in his chair and glared at me. "Wait.... with all the money your father has, he couldn't find someone who knew what they were fucking doing? You're actually telling me that for the last ten years, we've been married?" I nodded.

"Please keep your voice down. Father was suppose to take care of it. I saw the paperwork myself, it looked right. But when it was filed it didn't have your signature on it and it wasn't valid." I handed him the folder. "I just need you to sign these and it'll be done. We have to wait 30 days, but then it'll be official, this time."

He took the folder and opened it. He looked at the papers for a second before closing the folder and setting it on the table. I thought he would sign it right away, but I guess I was wrong.

"We need to go somewhere more private to talk about this. There are questions I need answered that only you can. Then we'll discuss this."

He moved to get up and expected me to do the same. I walked out behind him, willing to do almost anything to get him to sign these papers. "Follow me." With that he got into his car. I didn't even know where we were going but I did as he said.

We pulled up to a house and I realized this must be his house. I was suddenly very nervous about being alone with him here. I got out and followed him in, setting my bag on the table and took the seat he pointed at.

"Now. What exactly happened with our baby?" I wasn't expecting him to ask that and I took a deep breath. Hoping I could get through this.

"Ronnie, what does it matter now? I just need you to--"

"Sign the papers, yeah I know, Cassie. But this matters to me so tell me."

I ran a hand though my hair and looked at him. Taking a deep breath, I started. "You left, for tour. Everything was going incredible, with us, with the baby. We talked that night, for hours in between you show and your interview." He nodded. "I went to bed right after we hung up, I was do tired, I always was." I smiled and looked away from him. " I woke up in the middle of the night because I was in so much pain. I turned on the light and tried to get up. But when I moved the blankets, there was so much blood, I didn't know what to do. I got to the hospital and they said I had a late term miscarriage. I would never have had an abortion, Ronnie. I wasn't lying to you when I told you that I couldn't do that." I wiped a lone tear from my cheek.

"Why would he tell me differently, Cassie? You really expect me to believe you had a miscarriage?"

"Ronnie. He never wanted us together. He told me he would have done anything to get me away from you."

He moved closer and gently wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "You never wanted to leave me?" I shook my head.

"I loved you, Ronnie. I always wanted to be with you." He smiled gently and closed his eyes.

"I flew home right after you father called. He said you couldn't stand to be married to me anymore, that you couldn't bring yourself to have my baby. I didn't understand, we had just talked and everything was good. I tried to come see you, I had to talk to you, talk you into staying with me. I loved you too, Cassie. But they wouldn't let me in, told me you didn't want me there." I shook my head as more tears fell.

"And I was sitting in there begging him to get you there. I knew everything would be ok if you were there. I'm so sorry he did this, Ronnie. I'm so sorry."

He pulled me to him and held me tight, pulling me onto his lap. I let him and I wrapped my arms around his neck. "You have nothing to be sorry for. You didn't know what he told me. I'm sorry." I lifted my head and looked at him.

"For what?" He cupped my face in his hands and smiled sadly.

"For hating you all these years. I should have known." We sat there, just staring at each other as his thumbs caressed my cheeks. He leaned slowly forward and before I knew what was happening, his lips were on mine. I kissed him back, it felt so right to be here with him like this. It felt just as I remembered, if not better.

His tongue probed my lips and I eagerly let him in. Our tongues dancing together slowly. I moved so I was astride his waist, trying to get closer to him. I got lost in that kiss, I could only think of him, of his hands running along my body. It thrilled me to have him touch me again. His mouth left mine and descended to my neck, kissing and biting the skin gently, just like he use to. I gasped as his fingers were suddenly under my shirt, running over my skin, my back slightly arched as I clutched him tighter.

I had to stop this before it went any further. I was getting married to a man that wasn't him and here I was, making out with my soon to be ex-husband. "Ronnie. Wait." He lifted his head and looked at me, his eyes dark as his fingers still stroked my skin. "We can't do this. I'm getting married."

"Cassie. You can't marry him now. We could have a real chance here."

"What are you saying?" He kissed me once more and smiled.

"I don't want a divorce, beautiful. And I don't think you do either. Not with how you were just kissing me and letting me touch you."

I quickly got off of him and stood up. "I do though. I don't know why I let you kiss me, Ronnie, but I do want a divorce. I'm marrying Justin. I love Justin."

He laughed and shook his head. "Keep telling yourself that, Cassie, but it's not true. I think we've always wanted each other but with your father meddling, we never had the chance to work on this. We need the chance."

"You need to sign the papers, Ronnie." I picked up the folder and set it on the table in front of him and walked out.