Half Way Happy | E.D

17.

a couple weeks go by. ethan has been extremely careful with me. i told him everything that had happened, once i was ready.

he looked terrified.

now, he never lets me leave without a comforting hug.

he makes sure not to say anything that would remind me of that night.

it's sweet.

it makes me feel more safe.

i'm starting to realize it was the alcohol that had the impact on him.

he's promised not to go to anymore parties.

and i know that he keeps his promises. i know that it wasn't him that night. but there's still a slight fear in the back of my mind. and he knows it.

iridessa is supporting me. she's no longer telling me i have to break up with him, because she knows it only stresses me out. she gave up on it, because she knows i won't listen to her.

my parents are clueless the the whole situation. though i did tell maria, she promised she wouldn't tell a soul. and i believe her. i had her back when it came to brandon abusing her. i know she'll have mine.

but i wouldn't say ethan is abusing me. it was a one night thing. and he didn't mean it. i'm sure of it. so it wasn't much of abuse. just him losing self control.

maria requested i tell the police.

what a hypocrite.

"first of all. you didn't tell the police about brandon when i told you. so why should i listen to you? second of all, brandon abused you on the daily. by himself. ethan did it once, a few weeks ago. with the influence of drinking."

"bexley i just want you to be safe."

"he promised me i'm safe now."

"yes, i understand. just.. just tell me if he does it again, okay?"

"fine" i roll my eyes. my mom walks into the kitchen.

"hey girls. i heard brandon's name being brought up. he's not back, is he?" she puts her hand on maria's shoulder.

"no, mom, don't worry. i was just using him as a reference." she smiled.

"alright." my mom smiles at us and then starts towards the bathroom.

"by the way, dad is going to be gone two extra days. he'll be home wednesday" she reassured.

"okay" maria and i say in unison, nodding.

she went to the bathroom and i turned back to maria. i gave her the "that was close, too close" look and she rolled her eyes and nodded, mockingly.

i went back up to my room.

i could really use a nap right about now.

this whole thing is stressing me out. nobody has faith in me, my relationship, my boyfriend, my trust.

it's difficult feeling like nobody is on your side.

it's like the whole world is caving in on you when you've done nothing wrong.

i just don't understand my life sometimes.