I CAN'T [ BROCK BOESER ]

- eleven -

"Are you sure you're going to be OK?" Jessica asks for about the hundredth time today. I roll my eyes yet again and nod my head to her. She hasn't stopped worrying about me since the encounter with Hudson two days ago. I am still in slight shock at what happened, there was no indication that he was going to show up in my life again. I mean he did leave me in a horrible way and just as I was coming to terms with him not being in my life anymore, he arrives back in it. I am just glad that he has left now and won't be coming back any time soon.

"Yes, plus Brock is coming to take me out for lunch when he's finished with training." I tell and Jessica nods her head. She throws on her coat and takes another look at me; her head tilts to the side and she smiles.

"Don't do anything stupid, Lev." She warns. I nod my head at her, the quicker she goes the quicker I can go back to watching Netflix in peace before Brock shows up. I mean winter break is nearly upon us and I am getting ready to spend it watching Netflix 24/7.

"I'll be out the whole day, I might be home Monday morning maybe the afternoon." Jessica smiles cheekily at me and I chuckle as I understand what she's talking about.

"Have fun." I call out to her as she walks out of our dorm. Jessica closes the door and I sigh loudly, I lean back down on my pillow before hitting play on Netflix. I get comfortable and start to watch my show, a slight smile lingering on my thoughts as I think of Brock and seeing him again. It was so good to see him again after being away for so long and despite Hudson ruining our day, Brock stayed until late into the night and it hurt to see him leave.

It is an hour later and I'm still in the same position as I was when Jessica left, my laptop rests on my stomach as I am so engrossed in watching what's playing on the screen. I hear the door to my dorm knock and I pause the show, I wait until I hear the door knock again and then I push myself up off my bed. I check my phone for any messages or calls, it can't be Brock because he said he'd message me when he was on his way over and there are no messages from him. Maybe it's Jessica, she might have left her key behind before leaving. I roll my eyes at the thought and walk towards the door, I yank it open and that's when a sharp gasp leaves me. It is Hudson who knocked on my door. He stands on the other side, his hands are shoved into his coat pockets, and he has a sheepish look on his face when we make eye contact.

"Wait!" Hudson pleads when I go to slam the door in his face. He places his hand on the door to stop me from closing it, I sigh forcefully and open it further again. My heart is racing in my chest at the thought of us being alone, why is he even here? I am being stupid even talking to him, I should have slammed the door closed and called Jessica to tell her he was here again. But instead I stand in front of him with the door opened.

"What do you want?" I ask.

"Like I said last time, I want to talk to you." He says letting his hand fall from the door.

"And you think I want to listen to what you have to say?" I counter with a raised eyebrow. Hudson lets defeat take over his body again and I see how broken he is. He's let himself go big time from the last time I saw him, he has lost a lot of weight and muscle, his face is fallen and thin and I can see it looks almost grey as he stares at me. Not to mention the state of his hair, it was always in pristine condition and now it's flat, messy, and just makes him look unkempt. He just looks completely different to the man I first fell in love with.

"You wanted answers to why I did what I did, I'm here now with the answers." Hudson shrugs his shoulders.

"Yeah, seven months ago." I add and fold my arms across my chest. Hudson lets a sigh leave at my words, he bows his head and lets his shoulders slump.