Let us be happy?

•Chapter 22•

Justin's pov:

Its around 6 o'clock now. I'm downstairs eating dinner with my mom. We are sitting in silence. I look down at my food picking at it because I'm really not hungry. My stomach is growling but I don't want to eat. Knowing the fact that I can't see Raegan a lot and how much he thinks he's not protecting and supporting me, it's bothering me. He's everything to me and it's not fair. I feel like he thinks it's his fault because of what his dad did.

"Why aren't you eating?" I look up to see my mom looking at me concerned.

"I guess I'm not hungry." I put my fork down and look up at her.

"I can hear your stomach from here." She says.

"I don't want to eat." I shake my head. She sighs.

"Is it about Raegan?"

"Of course it is. I don't know if you heard, but he thinks our relationship if like this because of what his dad did. He thinks I don't deserve him because we can't be together a lot. I can't do anything knowing how he feels right now mom." I say upset just wanting to keep ranting.

"Honey what did I tell you? Maybe Raegan's starting to realize you two are not going to work out."

"I know he is and I hate it." My eyes gloss over with a thin layer of years.

"Justin you know every relationship doesn't work out."

"But it's not fair when it's the actual two people in love who don't think it's not working out." I say. "I love Raegan and he loves me. I don't understand. The past is the past. It's the future now. Who cares?" I add.

"Who cares thay your father is dead? You do that's who! And me!" She raises her voice.

"That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?" She stares at me.

"Nevermind. You don't understand."

"You're right I don't. So-"

"Its better that you don't understand mom. Forget it." I stand up from the table and walk out.

"Justin wait."

"What?" I go back in the doorway of the kitchen and look at her with a questioning face.

"If it'll help you at all, you can go to therapy tomorrow. But please go to talk to Cathy and not just be with Raegan. Talk about your depression and other problems. Okay?"

"Yea. Thanks." I say and walk away. I go upstairs and into my room.

I wonder how she would feel if she loved someone and they couldn't be together. I understand her husband died but she doesn't understand how I feel about Raegan. We are young and I want a future with him. He helps me. He cures me.

I'm going to therapy tomorrow to see Raegan. I will talk to Cathy, but seeing Raegan is my main reason. Maybe Cathy will have some advice for us.

*knock knock*

"Yeah mom?"

The door opens and she looks at me for a minute before speaking.

"Justin, do you want to eat anything? I know your upset but you really should eat." She asks.

"Umm, I don't know." I shrug.

"Please? It's not good for you to not eat." She says.

"I'll have a little. Can you bring it up here?" I ask.

"Of course." She smiles before shutting the door.

My mom loves me. I can tell she feels bad about all of this. But she's one of the reasons why I'm upset. I want to see Raegan as much as I can and be with him but she won't allow it. But at the same time, she knows how much I like Raegan. She doesn't believe I love him though. Maybe I need to show her I really do. I'm just exited at the moment to surpised Rae at therapy.

Its FRIDAYYY!  Sorry...😂 I love Fridays. It's last period there is a substitute...it's a good class 😁