Screw Crew

--FIVE--

AN UPDATE? WHAT!!!!

I know it's been forever and I know this is super short but this character is really important to the story. This is just an introduction to him. Next chapter should be up super soon. We're like halfway through writing it. Hope you guys like it <3333

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Chapter 5: Sheriff Colken

"Sheriff Colken, we've received a complaint."

You've got to be kidding me. Right when I want to enjoy a nice dinner-- Wendy's. I've been at the station all day and nothing, but now, at the ripe time of 11:30 pm, and people want to start acting up.

I wipe the bacon grease off my hands and gingerly take the file from the deputy's hand.

"What happened?" I ask in a gruff tone.

"Breaking and entering. Vandalism."

"What's the location?" I ask, finally opening up the complaint file.

"That new principal's house. What's his name again?"

"The principal at my son's school?" The deputy nods. "Hansen. His name is Hansen"

"Yeah, well anyway, he says that his house is trashed. Dicks on the walls, slime on the floors. It was probably a mindless prank by some kids at the school."

"Alright. Well, I'll head over to the house and check out the scene. Did you tell him not to disturb anything?"

"Yeah. He said he'd wait in his car."

"Good. Put your coat back on, we're gonna be out late."

I shrug on my coat and walk to the door, making sure I have all the supplies I'll need. I'm going to have to take pictures of the scene, although I have no clue who it could've been. There are countless numbers of people in this small town who would pull a stunt like this, especially on the last day of summer.

We pull up to the principal's house and see him sitting in his car. When he comes out, I can see he's dressed in a nicely tailored suit, but his dress shoes have remnants of slime on the bottoms.

"Hello sir, I'm Sheriff Colken. Could you please explain the situation."

I can see the principal assessing me. I get that look all the time. Just because I'm fat and short and I probably have bacon grease on my mouth does not mean that I'm bad at my job.

Eventually, he seems to realize that I'm all he gets, and he starts talking.

"Well, first off, some little shits broke into my house and destroyed everything. There a huge fucking dick on my bedroom wall and it seems like every inch of my floor is covered in multi-colored slime."

"The deputy and I will go inside and examine the crime scene. I'm not sure there's much I can do. There's likely no clues as to who did this. If anything, I can say it was one of the kids at the school you're working at. They're known for pranks like this. At this point in time, that's all I can offer up to you." I explain to the principal. He just nods and then returns to sitting in his car.

The deputy and I walk into the house. Immediately I smell paint. I've barely walked ten feet into the house when I hear a sucking noise. I look down to see my shoes encased in slime. Cursing, I remove my foot from the slime with a loud squelch.

It takes maybe two hours to collect evidence from the house. Most of the damage was painted onto the walls or the floor, so most of the evidence we collected was in the form of a picture. One thing is for certain. There is a huge ass motherfucking dick on his bedroom wall. Unless, he gets a completely new paint job, he'll be staring at that piece of art for a long time.

There were a few things stuck to the ceiling or a high place neither the deputy or I could reach. We would have to come back the next day to collect those pieces of evidence.

I exit the house to inform the principal of the situation, but his car is no longer there. My guess is he went to a hotel to shack up in for the night. I wish I could do that, but I'm going to have to do a shitload of paperwork. At least I have my Wendy's waiting for me.

I turn back to the house to tell the deputy that I'm ready to roll out when I see it. It's only three am and I only have the light of my flashlight, but there's no mistaking the hot pink polly pocket emblem on the bat showing in the big window.

Those little fuckers.

I race back into the house, ignoring the sound of my feet sludging their way through the slime.

"I know who did it." I pant when I find the deputy. I've probably run a distance of 50 feet, but I can't breathe and my chest burns. Shit.

"Who?" The deputy asks, turning around so quick he must've gotten whiplash.

"Let me tell you about the Screw Crew."