Once the child could live in fantasies and bare it all. The child believed that the fantasies kept them tamed, the fantasies helped. They once did. But now they do not. It's a sad thing and the child wishes there were an escape.
But there is. The child knows so, but the escape eludes the child's grasp. The child is left to continue.
The child yearns for the times when the 'what if's asked were gentle, playful, and tame. 'What if I found a clover?', 'What if I caught a butterfly?', 'What if I found a puppy?', 'What if I were a fairy?'. What if, what if, what if.
Recently the child conjured a happy fantasy. It brought some light in, some hope, a slight smile. The child believed that this was the fantasy they could seek refuge in. The child loved the fantasy, it was amazing, it was spectacular, it was so much better than all the dark fantasies that kept being created.
The child wanted to share the fantasy. But the child never did.
The child exited the fantasy with a lighter feeling.
What a great fantasy it was. What a great beauty it was. It was, it was, it was.
Doubts came once again. The beautiful fantasy was entered, the child wanted an escape.
The child entered and earned a heavy feeling.
The child exited feeling heavier.
The beautiful fantasy, was broken. It worked once, but the child had so much love for the fantasy. The child continued to enter the fantasy. Each time entering with a heavier feeling. Each time exiting with a heavier feeling. Stupid, stupid child. The child was ruining it, the child knew so, the child kept entering and exiting. Heavier, heavier, heavier.
The fantasy was no longer bright. The fantasy was raining. The child was raining.
The child is filled with 'what if's still. 'What if I touched it?', 'What if it ended?', 'What if I stood here?', 'What if I tried it?', 'What if I don't take it?'. What if, what if, what if.
The child is still childish. The child wants attention. The child wants you to stay. Pay attention! Pay attention! The child wants affection. The child is childish. Tell the child to grow up. The child is childish. The child is foolish. The child is just a child.
Children heal fast.
Don't mind the child.
Ignore the child.
The child is being a brat.
The child is just being a child.
The child is being childish.
What if I stood here?
Honk, honk, honk.
What if I touched it?
Drip, drip, drip.
What if it ended?
Ha, ha, ha.
What if I tried it?
Gulp, gulp, gulp.
What if I don't take it?
Flush, flush, flush.
The child is childish. That is why the child is continuing to go into the fantasy that is broken. The child is childish.
The child is such a hand full.
"Hurry up! I need to go!"
"Okay."
"I heard noises, you okay?"
"Yes."
"Okay."
The child has no reason for any of this. The child wants attention. The child is at fault. The child wants attention. The child makes you feel guilty. The child wants attention.
Stop, stop, stop.
It's okay, it's okay, it's okay.
You are fine.
Smile!
It hurts.
Be quiet.
It's a burden.
Please, please, please.
The child is childish.
Don't mind the child.
The child wants attention.
Ignore the child.
The child is a brat.
Leave the child.
The child is whining.
Tell the child to shut up.
The child wants affection.
Tell the child to leave.
The child is a hand full.
Make the child independent.
The child is childish.
The child must understand.
The child is a hand full.
The child knows so.
The child knows it's all true.
The child is childish.
Why won't it stop?
Why won't it stop!
Why won't it stop!?
Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
Tell the child to go away.
For the child is childish.
The child knows.
HMP.
HMP.
HMP.
HMP.
HMP.
Please.
Please.
Please.
Shh...
Remember.
The child is a child.
Children heal fast.
Ignore the child.
The child just wants attention.
The child is childish.
H
M
P
