Naïveté.

Chapter four.

"I.. I had so many firsts last night and I couldn't even really experience them..."
Alex was trying not to be upset, he really was, but it was difficult knowing he had done so much and didn't remember doing any of it.
"You don't have to consider them firsts if you don't remember them, yknow. Easy solution." Jack shrugged.
The two of them were currently wrapped up in Jack's bed, cuddled close together.
Alex was wearing Jack's clothes.
More specifically, his hoodie.
It was far too big on him and he loved it, just as much as he loved Jack.
"I guess you're right..." Alex sighed, wanting to just fall asleep and not have to go home to deal with his parents asking questions.
Jack did leave hickeys on his neck, after all.
Alex sat up, running a hand through his hair. "I just wish I could've... Yknow." He sighed.
Jack sat up as well, "Could've what?" He propped himself up on his arms, looking way too damn attractive for this time of day.
"I wish I could've felt it. Everything."
For once, Alex wasn't blushing. Maybe it was because he didn't only mean the sex. He meant the kiss, the buzz, the aftermath of it all.
"You say this like you want me to fuck you again." Jack smiled, teasing his boyfriend.
Alex cringed at his choice of words, shaking his head. "I wanna wait."
Jack rolled his eyes, "You do know you're not a virgin anymore, right?"
Alex threw the covers off and went around the room packing up his things.
Once more, Jack rolled his eyes, following Alex and getting out of bed.
"Baby, i'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."
The younger of the two sighed, letting himself be pulled into a hug from the taller man.
"I know you didn't mean to," Alex mumbled. "I'm just having a hard time with this, I guess."

Alex was promptly dropped off at his house, still wearing Jack's hoodie and not caring if his parents asked questions. He was tired and sore, he needed a break.
He headed straight for his room, throwing his bag onto the floor and flopping down into his bed.
Three knocks on the door, "Alex? Are you okay?"
"Yes, mama, i'm just tired. I'm gonna take a nap and then i'll be down."
"Alright, love. Sleep well."
Alex turned over in bed, covering himself with the blankets and closing his eyes.
But even so, he couldn't sleep.
He kept trying to imagine everything he did last night, trying to piece together the memories he did have.
He remembered Jack offering him a shot, then a glass of wine, and then it was a blur.
He tried to remember how the sex felt, how Jack felt inside of him.
He couldn't sleep.

On Monday, Alex was still upset.
"Hey, babe!" He heard behind him, but he kept walking.
"Alex!"
He turned his head to see Jack finally catching up with him.
"What's wrong?"
Alex didn't respond.
"Baby, if this is about what happened the other night.."
It's almost as if Jack could read him like a book.
"I wanna make it up to you, okay? I really do,"
Alex stopped.
"Stop, okay? Just.. Please. Stop. I'm okay. You don't have to do anything. Okay?"
Jack sighed, "I just want you to be happy. I feel horrible about it and.."
"Don't." Alex grabbed Jack's hand, "I'm okay. I am happy. I have you."
Jack smiled, pulling Alex into a hug.
"I'm glad."

That Friday, Jack took Alex out for a first date. A real first date.
Not some coffee shop after an accident, but a real date.
Unfortunately, though, their evening was cut short when Alex found himself nauseous without even eating at the restaurant Jack took him to.
"I hope you feel better," He said, dropping Alex off at his house. "We can try again next weekend, right?"
Alex nodded with a light smile, "Yeah, for sure."

On Monday, Alex wasn't there.
Jack had asked all of his friends, wondering where he was.
Finally, he decided to call him.
After a long dial tone, Alex finally picked up.
"Hello?"
He had just woken up, Jack could tell through his voice. He sounded so cute.
"Hey, baby. You feeling okay?"
Jack was genuinely concerned, and if Alex didn't feel well, he wanted to be there.
"Not really.. Woke up super nauseous again. I almost threw up."
Jack's concern grew. "Again?"
"Yeah, it's been happening for a few days now. I think I have a stomach bug or something. I may not come to school at all this week if it keeps up."
Jack rubbed the back of his neck, "Do you want me to come over after school lets out?"
"You don't have to," Came a sleepy mumble on the other end.
"But I want to, okay? Are your parents home?"
"No, they won't be until around 6ish."
Jack smiled, "Great. I'll see you soon."

2:45.
Jack shows up at Alex's house and doesn't bother to knock, finding the spare key and letting himself in.
"Alex? You still in bed, baby?" Jack called, making his way through the house. He had actually never been to Alex's house, so he followed the sounds of shuffling he heard in a nearby room.
"I'm in here," Alex called back, looking flustered and almost panicked. He had the covers all the way up to his chest, Jack noted.
"Hey, you feeling better at all?" Jack felt really bad, Alex looked so sickly.
"A little..." Alex trailed off.
Jack made his way to the bed, sitting by Alex and frowning when Alex shifted away.
"What's wrong?"
Alex was red hot, blushing like a mad man as he stumbled over his words.
It didn't take long for Jack to realize what he was hiding, though.
A smirk creased Jack's face as he shook his head, "You're not slick, you know."
Alex played dumb, "What? Wh-what're you talking about?"
"Alex, I know you were just masturbating. Don't play coy."
Alex's blush grew, stuttering, "I-I, u-uh,"
"Don't worry about it," Jack smiled, standing up. "I'll leave you to it, okay? Love you."
The taller man pressed a kiss to the younger boy's forehead, leaving the room and shutting the door behind him.
Alex let out a sigh of relief when he heard the front door close again, biting his lip and continuing what he didn't finish; thinking of Jack the whole time.