Light in Dark Places

Chapter Forty-Four

Joan, by now, has grown accustomed to the Kings in her home. So much so that she legitimately wonders if Seung-ri has any other friends.

When she comes home to the sight of an unfamiliar woman lounging on her couch it almost comes as a relief (largely, because she thinks her sister should have other friends, beyond the other Kings). The woman has dark skin and hair, distinctly Native American features.

The woman glances up and does a double-take, jolting from her position on the couch. "Holy Ashes, she really is awake."

"You doubted?" Jisu asks. He's perched on the red arm chair he seems to have claimed as his. Hernandez stands next to him, rigid and alert. He's always like this when other people are around.

"Yes, I suppose I did," the woman says, not taking her eyes off Joan. "You could have told me."

"You were very clear you no longer cared," Hernandez says, his voice sharp.

"Don't be a dick, Clemente," the woman says. She gets up and walks to Joan. "Hey, kiddo. I'm Susanna Begay. It's nice to finally meet you."

Susanna braided your hair.

Joan shakes her hand. Susanna's grip is strong and firm, Joan feels like she's flinching in the grasp.

"You were in the Academy with Seung-ri," Joan says.

Susanna raises a brow. "Did she tell you that?"

"N-no, I guessed."

It strikes Joan then that the woman looks different because she is in casual clothes. She's wearing jeans and a sky blue blouse, her hair in a long ponytail. Joan is used to seeing adults in military red. With the exception of Jisu, she almost never sees anyone dressed in casual clothes.

"You're right, I was in the Academy with Seung-ri and Jisu. The military life didn't suit me, though."

"And—" Joan doesn't know how to casually refer to the Thunder King, but she glances at him.

"Oh, Hernandez was there," Susanna says. "He was our teacher."

"Really?" Joan exclaims.

"We are not here to discuss the past," Hernandez says.

Susanna raises a brow. "Really? I thought that was exactly what we were here to discuss."

There's a long and incredibly awkward silence in the room.

Seung-ri comes in with cups and a pitcher of iced tea. "Oh, Joan. You're home. Have you met Susanna?"

"Yeah," Joan says.

"I bet you have homework," Seung-ri says, in a way that is not at all subtle.

"I do have homework," Joan acknowledges, because the atmosphere in the room is tense and she's all too happy to have an excuse to flee.

"Let her stay," Susanna says. "She should be here."

"We are not in the habit of discussing confidential military matters with cadets," Hernandez says.

At least, Joan thinks, he didn't say "children."

"You're talking to me, a citizen, right? Come on, kiddo, sit down."

Joan glances at Seung-ri first, who grudgingly nods and then she takes a seat on the armchair across from Jisu—the one closest to the kitchen, so that if Joan needs to flee she can.

"So," Susanna says. "You were asking me about Creosote."

Hernandez frowns, his lips thin. Joan thinks this must be because she's sitting here. He really doesn't want to talk about this with her here.

"Have you seen him?" Jisu asks, fixing his stare on Susanna.

"What even makes you think I would have?" Susanna returns.

"You were close once," Hernandez says.

"We were all close once!" Susanna says, throwing her hands up in the air. "But then he turned into a deranged homicidal lunatic! Honestly guys, this is feeling a little racist. You think just because we're both Native I still give a fuck about what he does?"

"That's not what this is about," Hernandez says.

"Because I'm Diné. And I have no idea what he is, but we are definitely not claiming him as ours."

"No one wants him as theirs," Jisu agrees.

"And that's the problem," Seung-ri says. "Because he's ours. He's our responsibility. All of us."

The room falls silent. Joan looks towards the kitchen, wondering if now would be an acceptable time to flee.

"I'm not going to let who I knew as a teenager control me forever," Susanna says, finally.

"Susanna—" Seung-ri begins.

"No. He is not my problem anymore." Susanna gets up. "I haven't seen him, OK? I haven't see him for almost two years. I left the military for a reason."

"You can't just ignore this, Susanna," Jisu says, leaning forward in his arm chair.

"Watch me," Susanna starts walking, but pauses when she reaches Joan's chair. She turns back to look at the Kings. "Your Academy is on Tohono O'odham land, you know that, right?"

"Yes," Hernandez says

"But you don't. Your ancestors stole our Place."

"My ancestors didn't," Jisu says cheerfully.

"Shut up, Jisu," Susanna says. "You know what I mean. I don't agree with Creosote, but I understood his anger. I understood your anger, Seung-ri, all those years ago. And yeah, Creosote is evil, and he went wrong in so many ways, but sometimes I think you just focus on the fact that he's evil and you forget why he was angry in the first place. You brought Mathiessen here."

"Susanna—" Hernandez says.

She shakes her head. "Just try not to turn into what we fought against, will you?" She faces forward again and places a hand on Joan's head. "Glad you're awake, kiddo. Sorry the world is such a crappy place."

You were all of ours.

Joan watches as she walks out the door.

"What, um. What did you want her to do?" Joan asks hesitantly.

"We didn't want her to do anything," Seung-ri says, sounding weary.

"Although, if she'd volunteered to help find Creosote, that would have been nice," Jisu says.

Joan sinks in her chair.

They're looking for allies. And they're not having much luck.