I hired a hitman to kill me (joshler)

One

Author's note- so this is going to be the second fic I write! I'd love you to read Mr Urie Loves Me if you haven't already, but it's in no way related to this book so it's no biggie if you don't. This fic probably won't be very long, maybe 10-15 parts at most. There will also be some trigger warnings in this fic, like the last one, so please read at your own risk.
I hope you enjoy this chapter :)

Trigger warning- abuse, suicidal thoughts

3rd person p.o.v.

The blue haired man lay curled up in a ball, sobbing, on his boyfriend's bathroom floor, blood running down his face as he earned another kick to the stomach.

"You're worthless, Josh! You hear me? Worthless," he spat, causing more tears to spill out of Josh's eyes.

It'll get better, Josh thought in his head. It will. Just wait.

But the thing was, it never did. Josh had been trapped in this relationship for over a year now, and it hadn't gotten better.

It had only gotten worse.

Finally, Brendon got bored with bullying Josh, and so he pulled him by the cuff of his shirt and had his feet dangling off the ground. Josh was only five foot five compared to Brendon's five foot nine.

"I'm going out," he growled. "You better be asleep by the time I'm back."
Josh nodded frantically, but he knew Brendon wouldn't be back until the morning. When Brendon "went out" it was always to drink. Brendon dropped Josh back down on the floor, and Josh made no attempt to get up.

As soon as Brendon left his house, Josh broke down again, sobbing heart-retching cries.

Josh stripped himself and looked at all the cuts and bruises and bumps that Brendon has caused, many of which probably required medical attention but Josh was not allowed to go to hospital, because Brendon would be found out.

Josh couldn't go anywhere without Brendon's permission.

How'd I get in this mess? Josh thought miserably. How do I get out of it?

And the answer he pondered was heartbreaking.

You don't. You can't. You won't.

More tears spilled out of Josh's eyes. He was desperate to escape this hell, but he didn't have many options. If he tried to leave Brendon, Brendon would simply kill him.

I refuse to let Brendon kill me.

Josh could kill himself, and then the police would investigate and Brendon would be arrested and locked up so no one else could be hurt by him.

But I wasn't depressed until I met Brendon. If I kill myself it tells him I lost. I was too weak for him.

I refuse to let Brendon make me kill myself.

I can't have an "assisted suicide" because I have no one to help me.

So that left no other options.

But....Josh thought. There's the deep web...I can hire a hitman to kill me! He can make it look like a suicide or he could frame Brendon, or whatever he wanted really, but it means that Brendon isn't killing me, and I am not killing myself either!

That's it.

Josh pulled his laptop out from its hiding spot, under the bed, under his spare clothes, and began his search for the deep web, which is extremely hard to find.

After an hour, Josh still hadn't found the website. Sighing, he was about to give up, until a red bar flashed across his screen.

Want to purchase something totally not illegal? Just press this link below!

That's got to be it, Josh thought, so he pressed it, and he was right.

He was shocked at much stuff there was.

Drugs, weapons, sex, slaves, bombs and so much more, most of which Josh wasn't interested in. Most of which were horrendous.

He just wanted a hitman.

He scrolled down the website until the letter H, and clicked on Hitmen.

This was easier than expected.

The tab opened saying, "Do you have that one person who you hate with a burning passion? Why not get rid of them, permanently?"

All he had to do was fill out a form, which he promptly downloaded and completed.

Hiring a hitman

Please tick, x and complete where necessary

Name: Joshua William Dun
Age: 19
Height: 5'5"
Appearance: image attached.

Type of death:

Fast ✅
Slow ❌
Torture ❌

Weapon:

Gun ✅
Knives ❌
Hitman's choice ❌

How will the body be left?

No trace of the body (burned/discarded) ❌
Leave the body but no weapons ❌
Leave the body and weapons (suicide framing) ✅

Choose your hitman:

Tyler Joseph, aged 21, 3 years in experience, takes 1 week to complete the job ✅
Phil Lester, aged 20, 1 year in experience, takes 10 days to complete the job ❌
Pete Wentz, aged 22, 5 years in experience, takes 2 weeks to complete the job ❌

Josh picked Tyler, because he took the shortest amount of time, and because his picture looked pretty good. Not that it made a difference, really. Josh just wanted to end it as soon as possible.

Total cost: £1500

Josh didn't know how good it bad that was, considering he had never been on the deep web before, and he certainly hadn't heard of the price of hitmen, but he decided it didn't matter because he was going to die anyway. Besides, his was probably a cheap death, since he chose a simple weapon and a fast death, and Tyler wouldn't have to clear up after him.

It'll be over soon, Josh thought. Just one more week.

Josh pressed submit and felt a sense of peace, which was rather unexpected.

It will be over soon.