The Distinctions between us

Guilt

Noah
Crrrrrrrrrrr! "Arghhh!"I groan when I hear the alarm.Is it six already? I only had two hours of sleep. I sigh and drag myself to the sink.

I am  shocked when I see my reflection in the mirror. First I have bags under my eyes. My lips are chapped and my hair looks like bad yet good.Generally I look beyond exhausted and that's because the whole week I have had sleep like today.

Latifa... She was  behind my sleepless nights and my misery life this one week. I have been texting,calling her and I've even wait to corner her in Calvin's college but to no avail. So I'd spent my nights thinking about her and waiting for her call or text in case she decides to do so but again nothing came. 

Ring! Ring! Ring!."Shit" I muttered to myself. I dashed out of the bathroom and went to my bed in search of my phone. When I found it, I saw the caller ID.It was my mom.

"Hello... Ma? "I said annoyed.
"Good morning honey. How are you son?"She sounded full of energy.
"I am okay ma. Why are you up this early ma? "and why is she even calling me.
"Yes. I wanted  to remind you that you've an interview with the Vogue magazine. Your manager told me that you've been cancelling all your plans the whole week but I won't let you cancel this one honey. "

"Stupid manager! "I murmured.
"what was that honey? "Mom asked.
"Oh nothing. Why did he even talk to you about this ma? "I couldn't hide the anger.
"It was not his fault. I wanted to know your progress son.That's all"Right ,I forgot she was my governor.
"okay. What time is the interview?"I asked not sure I am really up for it.
"At ten o'clock. Be  ready okay?"I could tell she was more excited than I was.
"okay"I assured her.
"And son,just to remind you that you've been wanting this for long.It's finally here. So whatever distress  you have please forget about it.Atleast for today. Fine?"It was true. I have wanted to have this interview for a while now and she knew it too. So I'll  do it for her.
"Fine ma.Love you"I always told her that but today it's for a different reason. It's because she's been beside me all this time.
"Love you too son. "Then she hang up.

I stood awhile and got back to my routine. Waiting for the water to warm up, my mind wondered to Latifa. What if she's  found out I am Noah and that I lied. But she shouldn't fuss about it if so. Actually she should brag about it to her friends.But I don't think that's it. There must be something else. What? I thought she had accepted the idea about spending time together nonetheless.

Arghhh! I groan. Just for today,I won't think about her. I had promise mom today no worries.I got out of the shower and walked in my closet.

***
I arrived  at my destination and immediately started on my interview. I thought I had abide by the rule no worries for today but I was wrong. I was insane to hope this query would never come.

"So Noah, the ladies are asking if  there will be a cat fight in case a lady is interested in you?In short, is there someone  you're dating? "I felt sweat trickle down my forehead and my palms were all sweaty while I fidgeted.I am sure it was even obvious to them that, that was the hardest question for me throughout the whole interview.

Well. I am interested in a girl and she's made this whole week nothing but torture for me.But I don't think she has the slightest idea what she's putting me through by just ignoring me. I actually think I am the least person she likes or wants to date.

I looked up when the interviewer cleared his throat. Then he said.
"it's not a must you give us the name if she likes to keep it private. Also you can choose to just say 'it's personal'.

Ooh he has no idea. I'd have publicly announce that she's the I one like but she has no idea whatsoever that I  am a celebrity and I have no idea how she'll react. So I finally answered;
"No. I am not taken. Welcome to date anyone. "

Finally, we finished with the interview and I should have been happy because it's an achievement. Actually I am supposed to celebrate but that's the least thing in my mind.

I got into my car and just drove to nowhere in particular.Guilt!Guilt is all I could feel. Guilty first because I lied to Latifa about myself. Again guilty because I have not confessed to her that I like her very much. Guilty because I lied in the interview and as far as I know lots of people read the Vogue magazine.

I can't take it anymore. I need to get it out. All these guilt. It's killing me. Ring! Ring! Ring! And I knew it was mom again. She probably wants to know how it went with the interview. I pulled over so I could talk with mom and also to avoid getting into an accident when I am not in the right state of mind.

"Hy ma.Don't worry,it went well. I did not disappoint you I promise. "I started as soon as I received the call.
"Ooh! I know honey you did not disappoint me. All along you've never really dissapointed me. I just wanted to ask you now if you want to talk about it? I mean whatever is bothering you perhaps? "Thank God I had pulled over because she shocked me I tell you.

"What are you talking about ma? Nothing's really bothering me. "I tried to sound casual but I know she knew I was lying.
"Really now,my baby is so big he doesn't want to share his problems with mama anymore."
She sounded sad. I am really tempted to share my distress with her and maybe get some advice from her since she has always been my confidant.

"Okay if you don't want to share,bye then. " and she hung before I even got to speak.Really all I can feel right now is guilt and It would make me feel better if I told Latifa the truth and how I felt. That's  the manly thing to do since I am a man.

Should I go to Latifa's place or to my mom? I questioned myself before I started the car.

***
Hy lovelies.😋Can you guess what Noah/Austin will do? What are you waiting for then. Comment! Vote if you liked this chapter and don't forget to share.
RQ:whose your confidant? Don't worry I don't know any of you. Mine is Allah of course but aside from him, my best friend. Yes not even my mom like Noah.

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