Heart of a Traitor

13: A Million Dreams

Luke explains what happened as he leads me to the edge of the camp, towards the lone pine tree. He says that on the night the three of them made it to Camp Half-Blood, they got cornered by a monster. Thalia was the brave one, the one willing to sacrifice herself. And instead of letting his daughter die, Zeus turned her into a tree, forever providing protection for any half-blood who stumbles upon Half-Blood Hill.

I'm quiet as he talks. The words take a long time to sink in. And all the while, I can only think one thing: I should've been there. Maybe things would've turned out different if I had been. Maybe Thalia would be completely alive right now, enjoying her human life.

Luke allows me to process it all in silence. When I finally glance at him, I see that he looks as guilty as I feel. Does he blame himself for Thalia's fate?

"She never forgave me," he says after a long period of silence. "For sending you back home, I mean."

"I don't blame her," I admit.

His face falls. There's pain in his eyes. "El, you have to know that if it had been up to me, I never would've called your family. I thought about you every day and I... but you were hurt, and the reason that you left—that threat was gone. Your family was missing you everyday. I thought I was doing the right thing."

Why do people always try to do the right thing? Why can't they be selfish sometimes? "I know, Luke."

"And when your mom and Jake came to the hospital and I told them everything," he continues, "they looked so happy. I mean, they were concerned and worried, but they were just glad to know that you were alive. They'd begun thinking they would never see you again. It felt like the right choice."

"I know, Luke." It's all I can bring myself to say.

"Can you forgive me?"

Before I can answer, a bell rings from the heart of the camp. Everyone stops what they're doing and begins heading towards the mess hall.

"Time for dinner," Luke announces, explaining what the bell signifies. "Walk with me?"

We walk in silence. It's awkward, tense. There's too much history between us to have awkward silences. But there's also too much history between us for it to not be tense.

I  learn quickly that the tables are segregated. Luke explains that there's a reserved table for every god and goddess. Some tables, like the Hermès and Apollo cabins, are overcrowded. Others like the Demeter and Hera tables are hardly filled. Then there's the Big Three tables—Zeus, Poseidon, and Hades—all of which are empty.

"Since your parent hasn't claimed you yet," Luke tells me as we approach the Hermès table, "you'll sit with us. You'll also stay in the Hermès cabin."

I try not to think about it too much. Eating with Luke. Sleeping under the same roof as Luke. The thought makes my heart race nervously.

I take a seat next to Luke, across from the twins I had seen earlier.

"...not being claimed?" The one of the left is saying.

"Earthquakes aren't the same as water powers," the other one says, "and we don't even know she caused—"

His twin taps him on the shoulder, making him shut up. Both of their gazes flick to Luke and me.

"Oh, hey!" The one of the right says. "We were just talking about you."

"El," Luke says, "meet Connor and Travis Stoll." He leans in and whispers, "Don't worry about being able to tell them apart. None of us can."

"Heard that, wise ass," one of the twins tells Luke.