tell me it's alright

Questions and Answers

As I put my clothes back on and sat on the stool, the first question that came out of someone's mouth was from Pinoe. "Does he know that you have left him? And have you taken everything from the house yet?"

I took a deep breath and try to figure out how to word it. "No he does not know that I left, and he does not know I am staying with Kelley. He is most likely on one of his runs because I haven't heard from him since that night, and no I haven't taken everything from the house yet. Everything is so difficult right now I am going to wait a couple of days until I get my feet settled back down."

Everyone nodded their heads understanding my answer. I did not think that answering questions was going to be so difficult.

The next one was from Allie. "Why did you decide to leave now?

I gulped. I was hoping someone wouldn't ask this question. "The night all his friends came over scared me. I was thrown around like a rag doll, and was treated like one. I was like a personal punching bag, and they had full control over what I drank and what drugs I took. I was powerless. When Jill and Dawn woke me up yesterday morning I was scared. I was disoriented I didn't know what was going on until all the memories came flooding back from the previous night. I was greatful that they came an checked on me, but it made me realize that what if that happens again. What if Nick and his buddies go to far? What if next time Jill and Dawn comes and checks on me I don't wake up. It scared me so I decided I needed to leave."

Everyone was stunned at what I just said. Hell I was even stunned at what I said. I didn't realize he scared me that much. I didn't realize I was terrified that he was going to end up killing me until she asked the question, and everything just came flooding out.

I answered a few more questions, mainly about how long I planned to stay with Kelley, and if I ever plan to press charges against him or not. People were quietly chatting when I heard baby Mal with with tear stained cheeks say barely above a whisper, "You're gonna be alright though right?"

Hearing her say that about broke my heart. I got off the stool and walked to where she was sitting and lifted her into my lap, and wrapped my arms around her slowly rocking her. "Yes sweetie everything will be okay. I will be okay." By this time I was starting to cry. "Everything may be rocky for a little bit but in the end I will be okay."

I held her for a few minutes until I looked down and saw she fell asleep. I waved over to Ashlyn to grab her and take her to her room so she could sleep.

About that time Jill came back up to the front of the room. "I know everything has been a crazy morning. We are going to meet at the lobby at noon so we can go have a team lunch so you have a little free time, and then practice at 4."

With that the room started to clear out except for some of the players who have retired or haven't been called in, and then Kelley.

I knew the older ladies wanted to talk, I waved Kelley off telling her I would be fine. She nodded reluctantly, but left the room.

Now the only people in the room was Christie, Abby, Hope, and myself.

Abby was the first to speak up. "You didn't have to tell everyone you know."

All I could do was laugh at that time. "That is what everyone keeps telling me, but I had to. I needed to."

They nodded and decided not to press on. The silence was short lived when Christie decided to speak up. "Did you get a rape kit done? Because when you said you thought you might've been raped and all."

Sighing deeply, "No I didn't. It would be useless now anyways I took a shower last night, and don't blame Jill or anyone because the first time they heard about it was when I told y'all."

The next question struck me the hardest. "How are you going go get everything that is yours out of the house?" Christie asked.

I hadn't thought about that. "Honestly I have no clue. I have no plan, hell I'm homeless right now. I don't want to be a burden to Kelley by staying at her house to long, and me and Alyssa are at each others throats about why I stayed so long. I don't know how I'm gonna get my shit out of the house. I don't know where I am going to store everything once I get it out of the house. I-I just don't know anymore..."

I sat down in a chair and just cried. Everything that has happned the last couple of days just caught up to me and I can't stop it.

I heard a couple of whispers and then it was silent for a couple of minutes until someone lifted up my chin. I flinched as usual.

"Sorry" she said.

I looked up and I was eyes to eyes with Hope.

"I know everything seems crazy right now." She started. "I know it feels like you don't have any control right now, but I see the way Kelley has helped you just in these past few hours. I saw when you were struggling, she was ready to come up and help you. I saw how reluctant she was to leave when we wanted to talk to you."

She stopped for half a second and started laughing softly to herself.

"And when you started apologizing to Alyssa. The way she looked at you. It had hurt. But it also had love. I could say she loves you like Kelley loves you, but we would both be lying to ourselves. You guys may not see eye to eye about Nick, but she wants the best for you. She really does love you"

She stopped and looked at her watch and sighed. "It's nearing 11:30. You want to go get ready for lunch?"

I shrugged my shoulders and stood up. I looked up at her before exiting the room. "Thank you."

All she did was nod as we left to go get ready for lunch.

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