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14

Words, how little they mean when you're a little too late.

~Taylor Swift ("Sad Beautiful Tragic")

*****

Tali was exhausted after the park, and nodded off halfway through dinner. Tony watched fondly for a moment as her head drooped forward, slowly nearing the table.

He got the bill and a box for the rest of their food, and then scooped her up to return to the hotel.

He tucked her into bed before retiring to the couch. He reached for the TV remote, but his eyes fell on his open suitcase before he could get around to turning the TV on.

He still hadn't looked in the box Orli gave him.

Something propelled him forward, and he found himself sitting on the floor with the box in his hands. It was sturdy, wooden with a gold latch, but surprisingly light. He ran a finger over the lid, wondering what was inside.

Was curiosity enough to cancel out his grief?

His thumb hesitated over the latch.

What's the worst that could happen? She was already gone. The worst had already happened. All that could happen now was more grieving.

Better to know. Better to get it over with.

He flicked the latch up and carefully eased up the lid.

The box was unlined, letting his eyes drop immediately to the small pile of items.

Topmost was a photograph. He'd never seen this one before, nor could he remember it being taken, but he could guess based off Ziva's hair that it was from many years ago. Given the fact the picture seemed to have been taken from behind a potted plant, he could only imagine Abby sneaked this picture of him and Ziva sitting by the window, lost in conversation.

She had her head thrown back mid-laugh, eyes squished shut. Happy. Relaxed.

His eyes lovingly traced the shape of her face, filling in all the details that weren't visible from that distance.

He set the photo aside so he could see what was underneath it.

His heart rate sped up as he recognized the folded sheet of paper. Why was this in here?

He unfolded it, eyes instinctively going to the large block words: STOP THIS FOR HIM. He'd seen these words before, but not the smaller scribble below them.

'I told you I meant Gibbs. You knew better.'

Okay, but that didn't make things any clearer. His initial confusion returned. Stop what?

He moved his fingers, about to flip the page over, and he noticed the words that had been hidden.

'You were so open with me. I was not ready for that. I was not in the right place to return to DC with you. Not yet. I wanted to be something else, someone better, someone you deserved. I needed to stop what I was doing to myself. I needed to stop being that version of myself. I needed to stop shutting you and everyone else out. I stopped too late.'

Tony shook his head.

She was right about one thing. It was too late.

After he set the page aside, he picked up the rubber-banded stack pf photos. These too seemed to be taken on the sly, countless candids of the team, though many of them appeared centered on him and Ziva. He didn't know whether to give Abby a piece of his mind or to thank her.

Thumbing through them a second time, he decided he was very appreciative of Abby's stalker-like ambitions.

He replaced the rubber band around the pictures and set the stack with the list and other picture.

What was next?

He pulled out an unmarked envelope, weighing its stuffed contents in his hand.

Tears pricked at his eyes when he peeled up the flap and saw what the envelope contained.

He flipped the first photo over for a moment to see if a date had been written on the back. June 23, 2014.

He stared at the picture again, nearly overwhelmed by the sight of Ziva holding their newborn daughter. He would've given anything to have been there.

The next few pictures pushed him even further over the edge, the usual baby snapshots somehow taking on new meaning, new beauty. This was his little girl, his world. These were her memories, how Ziva remembered her.

He watched as Tali got bigger, got her baby teeth, learned how to sit, crawl, stand up. He thumbed through her adventures, a life Tony never got to be a part of and would forever be trying to replicate.

The last photo in the envelope looked as if it could've been taken within the past couple of days, and he hated to check the date.

Two days before he found out.

His heart sunk in his chest. He glanced back at the first picture before shoving them all back in the envelope.

He set the envelope aside but hesitated to pull the next item out of the box. He wasn't sure how much more he could take in one day.

Maybe he'd take a break from this. Surely he deserved an escape from his life, from this.

Mind made up, he replaced everything in the box, latched it shut, and tucked the entire thing back in his suitcase.

He grabbed the TV remote and turned on the TV, relieved to find a channel playing Magnum, PI reruns. Exactly what he needed.

*****

Sorry if that ending seemed a little abrupt, but this chapter took a lot out of me (not that I had much of anything to begin with, with this super fun headache).

Anyway, hoped you enjoyed this. Let me know in the comments if you have any ideas for what else could be in that box.

Be sure to vote! It keeps me motivated to write when I know you guys are liking the story!