So here i am on a Saturday evening in a red dress, stunning make-up, 5" high stilettos in silver of course and lets not even begin to talk about the hair; and I guess I have Tola to thank for giving me a reason to trade in my pyjamas and fluffy Rabbit Slippers for a little bit of elegance tonight.
Today was supposed to be one of those days that "the very socially awkward me" will cash in on my saved up courage and let loose a little amongst a bunch of people I don't know and just enjoy being out even if it is at the celebration of the coming of a child. They have open bars at those things don't they???
I had a simple plan go to a party looking fly, get lost in the backgrounds, have a go at the all you can eat buffet (you don't get those everyday), drink a little and go back home.
What I however didn't plan for was the turn of events ohohohohoho!!!!! Boy was I wrong!! things began to go wrong as soon as I opened My door to go out and I was greeted by the presence of My Mother;
"H......hiiiiiii muuuum" I said suprised to see My Mother Abimbola Davies in the flesh, standing at My doorstep looking livid with hands hanging in the air as though she was about to knock. I didn't even hear the bell ring.
"Omo ale se bi o se maa kii iya e ni yen? (is that how you'll greet your Mother?)" she complained as she let herself in with her bags in tow.
"Harrumph" hear we go again!!! I muttered rolling my eyes as i got on my knees to greet her.
"Ekale ma (good evening)" I greeted as my brain began to run 50 miles per hour trying to figure out exactly what she is up to coming here at this time and I just had to ask;
Bawo le se rin? ki le nwa ni bi la asiko yii?? (why are you here at this time) I questioned but mum didn't give me a fitting reply but I suspect it has something to do with all the numerous calls I had not bothered to respond to which leads back to all this husband talk of hers.
"Mo wa de ba e lo run nii, se o ni pe oo fe gbo nii emi ga an o de ni gba nonsense
(I have come to stay and the battleline has just been drawn);" was her response. At this point I was already frustrated with her.
"Mum and her antics"
"Mummy you really can't be serious. You cant just show up here like this"
I said exasperated;
"Well waa deal pelu e noni next time ti mo ba pe ee waa da hun le mewa
(well you'll just have to deal with it, when I call you next time you will answer me ten times)"
typical Nigerian mum I should have expected such a snarky remark like that but it didn't end there because that was when she began to scream;
"Abi se mo gbena so ri ni ti o de n sa fun mi eyi calls, oo ni gbe a tun ran eeyan si e pe ko yo ju si mi o ooo wa.
(why won't you pick your calls? Do I have fire on my head? I even sent a message to you but all to no avail)."
I should have expected that too considering its always mum's go to sob story. Oh well not today she isn't; so I did the next logical thing.
"Uhmmmph" I exclaimed the frustration setting in.
"I can't be here right now e je ki n de (wait till I return) then we will talk"
I stated leaving immediately, ignoring her screams in the background I will just ignore her BS and pretend my mood is not totally ruined. I do still have that party to look forward to.......
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Old Maid
RomanceAlthough unmarried and in her early thirties, Gbemi had it all the job, the car and the nice apartment. Her relationship with her mother was however, not very good thanks to her unmarried status What happens when she meets her old best friends and...
