Lost My Number | MYG ✔

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A/N: So me. I have diff techniques to not be called during recitation. Like, *pretending to thinking really hard, *pretending to drop something so that I can bend down and be away from the teacher's sight, *going to the restroom, *looks down ;D

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Who know that three words were enough to shatter someone's world?

I hate you.

Love and hate were two sides of the same coin. They are both deep emotions that occur in the same area of the brain. It is very easy to bounce between the two because the line is so thin between them. The opposite of both is "indifference", which is a complete lack of emotional stimulation. It is much easier to turn someone who hates you to a lover than it is to turn someone indifferent toward you into a lover. In fact, if someone is not giving you the time of day, it is often much easier to seduce them by spiking their emotions in a negative way first.

That's what Min Yoongi thought. He knew from the first. He was scrolling through his phone and came across Y/N's number. After 4 years, he still have that. He wasn't sure if that number is still valid, but he decided to give it a go. That's why he decided, that he still loves Y/N and wants to win her back.

How wrong he was.

He thought of every possibility of what may happen. He knew there was a possibility that this may not work, but he was too excited, too naïve, to even think of what she may feel if she finds out that he's been taking advantage of her amnesia state.

But what Yoongi said was true. He too, was affected by the accident.

He was deeply affected to the point of developing OCD. Never did he once slept peacefully because of the voices in his head. Telling him that it was his fault.

Telling him that if he listened to her and didn't stay in that bar, they would still be happy.

Telling him he's not worthy of living because of what he's done.

Telling him to end his pathetic life.

There was a time when he had enough. Relying on a simple, small, delicate metal to wash the pain away, along with the swirls of water that turned crimson red down the drain.

Every night, he woke up to the feeling of numbness, especially on his wrists. He always wakes up in the bathroom, which became the place where he can lock himself up and let the pain go away.

But in the back of his head, he knew.

He knew that cutting himself is just a temporary numbness to the pain he was feeling. It won't go away, unless...

“I kill myself...” He always mumbles to himself, the demons in his mind shouting in approval.

He wanted to, be he didn't have the courage to. He was just too much of a coward.

There was a time when his parents accompanied him to the mental ward as they can't take it anymore to live with an incoming sycophant.

He felt abnormal.

But, he remembered how much she loves music. And that's how music became a way for him to vent out his feelings and decided to enter the world of music.

In the world of music. He forgot his old self, he left everything behind, just like the coward that he is.

He killed the miserable, pathetic Min Yoongi, and hid himself behind a personality that he is not.

He became Min Suga. He became Agust D of BTS.

He composed music to let out his anger without anyone asking,“Are you alright?” and make people think that he is okay, and he just wrote such tragic song for others, even though he was the one hurting.

This became another way to ignore the pain of his past.

At least it was better than leaving scars in his body.

In Bangtan, he was Suga.

Not Min Yoongi of Daegu.

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A/N: I feel like I just made a back story of Yoongi ;(