.Rise And Fall.

.Rise and Fall. (22)

|Chapter: 22|

Nickel's POV:

I still remember.

That day was like any other day after my brother's death. I was sitting on the porch of my house staring into distance of the lonely looking neighbourhood. I was lost in my dark thoughts when the scene played again and again inside my head.

How cruel everything turn into, from happy and smiling to wailing and crying in a split second. My head hurt like hell even remembering the incident and I was almost close to collapsing. I closed my eyes pulling my hair with my hands possibly to pull out my head, put it in the washing machine and wash out all the memories.

Sound of screeching tires made my eyes open abruptly and I turn my head to look at the van which has stopped in front of the house next to us. A woman step down the van and walked around hastily before taking out boxes from the back. The old woman living in the house where the van has stopped ran out of her house, to probably welcome the new comer.

"Oh Hailey dear, how have you been?", she practically squealed with excitement and pulled her into a hug. Hailey pulled away before turning to look back at the van, "Serena honey, come meet your grandmother."

The next person who stepped out of the van turned my world upside down. Like a ray of sunlight into a dark room her blonde hair shone, blinding me. Nothing could've beat that brightness. Serena. That name rang inside my brain like an alarm, which didn't bother me like the one I had next to my bed.

The blonde haired girl wearing a T-shirt which was way too big for her with written, 'Plants and Flowers are my Best friends' and blue shorts came running to the old woman, her grandmother. She engulfed the little Serena into her tight hug before kissing her forehead and telling her how beautiful she has grown into. Indeed she was right.

While the younger woman, who I assume to be the mother and the grandmother went near the van to pull out some more boxes, Serena turn to me and when those blue ocean-like eyes looked at me curiously, I felt my chest tighten.

The warm July breeze blew, making her hair fall on her face. Then she smiled through her hair. (Sounds like a clićhè movie scene. But thats what happened that day, seven years ago.)

In that mere moment, I forgot about my brother's death, I forgot about the present hell I was living in, my head pain long gone. All I could think was, when I said before nothing could beat that brightness, I was so wrong. I was too shocked to return her smile. I was far away from that kind of warm gesture, smile. Because, after my brother's death all I ever got was that stinky eyes full of hatred and accusations.

She frowned a little pushing her hair behind her ear as I continue to stare at her, my expression completely nothing. And then she turn her back to me before rushing inside the house. My eyes widened with realisation, I turned down the light that brightened my darkness. What a piece of shit was I back then. Still I am. That night I didn't sleep with my usual thoughts but a smile.

Next morning, Mom informed during the breakfast about the Williams shifting in the next house and I had an excited feeling inside my stomach. I walked down my porch with my backpack hugged closed to my back, looking in the direction of her house. I froze when I saw her in a yellow color floral dress with a pink backpack. Not at all my choice of color but she is beautiful no matter what. The girl really loved flowers and bright colors. That I've known over the years of stalking her like a creep. I waited and waited for her to see me. So I could give her the smile I practiced in the morning in front of the mirror that day. (I was a dumb kid, well more like a shit.) It was hard to form something I didn't do for last seven months. She flicked her eyes away from me, ignoring me she got inside the shiny blue mustang with an old man and drove off while I stood there.

In her first day of school, I saw her with the Adams' twins. She was giggling with Salvor. I felt annoyed, sad but mostly angry. She made me feel things, I never felt before. Almost everyday I saw her hanging with the twins. A part of me was relieved that Sarah was always with them not leaving them alone. While she ignored me like a plague. I tried all type of stunts for her to notice me during middle school. I wanted her to confront me, scold me for the mischiefs I did but none of them worked. She continued to ignore me like I wasn't even worth trying. But got closed to Salvor. I hated the guy all my last seven years of life and I still do.

Over the years, I've tried to read her beautiful blue eyes. The only thing that her eyes ever revealed was sacredness, doubts and confusions. The only girl I was scared to lose was scared of me. And that thought alone scared me to death. Sooner or later she'll find out the devil of a brother I was. And hate me more than she already does. The question is, Will I be able to bear that?

Slowly, I started to realise that she was like everybody else. Coward. Zac was and will always be the only person I can rely on. But FUCK! If only that shit worked. She continued to mess with my mind without even having a hint. The nightmare of my brother's death was enough for my sleepless nights, I didn't need another one. I needed ways to forget her. So these are the ways I choose, different kind of addictions, racing at the tracks, fighting people and dealing drugs. I kept myself as busy as I could. And by that I mean, I fucked as many girl as I could while only one girl fucked up my brain and my whole system. I found the pleasure but not the happiness. It helped me ease my mind (only for some time) and then she comes back rushing to my mind. That is the moment I get mad and break things. 'Why can't she just fucking leave me alone? I can never have her.'

Then she showed up on my door that day, my hopeless hope was light up.

Damn. Fuck me, if I don't admit this. When we kissed, it was better than all the orgasm I ever had till now. I can write a book on my emotions, how I felt at that moment. I died for her attention, dreamt to smell her hair like a freaking weirdo. What exactly can you expect, what was going inside my brain while kissing her soft lips? We were developing some sort of thing between us. Finally, I thought. Maybe not with a very good start, because I already beat up that guy to almost losing his life when he tried to force him on her. Shit I could even kill people for her.

I am obsessed with the girl sitting next to me right now.

She has been my only dream since I was eleven.

She dangled her feet in the air as we sat on the wooden bridge over the river, with a small frown on her face. The face I could look at for hours. I was scared to even blink. What if I open and she disappear, I thought. Zac was right about me being a whipped pussy. Not something I'll ever admit to him. But that wuss seems to know everything.

She didn't talk to me after I cracked her ankle. Well it was just her bone and I knew all along I wouldn't hurt her. She should be happy, now that she could use her leg normally. And I should be the one mad at her because of what she did in the morning. She chooses that fucker all the damn time. I know they are not dating and there are no rumours. But that doesn't make me feel any better. Even the thought of them being together boils my blood.

But right now, I'm happy. She's with me. Right by my side.

I couldn't help the smile that escapes my lips when I remember her face when I pulled that screaming joke on her. She was beyond shocked with her eyes wide.

You are so adorable, Rena.

I turn to look at the most beautiful creature only to find her already staring at.

"Did you just smile?"

******
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