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7 - Sorceress' Knight

When I was young, the world was much different. Smartphones were nonexistent. Computers were large and bulky. Internet connection was a luxury. Great games were few, and their names carried great weight. Much, much greater weight than what they have today. 

A game named Final Fantasy VIII  (FF8) was THE game of my junior high school years. In case you, my friends, are not familiar with video games, FF8 is the eighth instalment of a long-running series of Japanese role-playing games. Back in the day, FF8 was huge. I remembered seeing its advertisement on a monthly computer magazine that my father used to buy. There was a series of articles giving strategies to get through this epic game. I begged my parents to buy me the game, and they said that I can get the game if I finished the semester as the top student. So I worked hard, while looking at advertisements and articles everyday, dreaming about playing the game.

Months passed, and I finally earned the game. It was massive, literally. Four CDs, 6 guidebooks. And thus, my epic journey began. At that time, I could not understand English, so I had to rely on the poorly translated guidebooks to make sense of what was happening in the game. It was amazing. I remembered the awe when watching the intro sequence, the tingling when hearing Waltz for the moon (video), the fright when facing the sorceress at the end of disk one, the laid-back feeling when visiting a place called "Fisherman's horizon". The game followed me through my junior high school. I revisited the epic journey in my difficult days in high school. I returned to the world the third time when I was in the last days of my undergraduate time.

Even when I was not able to read English well, there was one concept of the game that stood out to me: "Sorceress' Knight". In the world of FF8, sorceresses are women who can use magic naturally, without the support of technologies and tricks. They are descendants of the Creator of the world himself. Being a sorceress is a lonely existence, as they are generally shunned by the world for their power. Moreover, at anytime, they can lose their mind and hurt the ones they love the most. Their ultimate power comes with curses. 

The only one who stands with a Sorceress is her loyal knight - the Sorceress' Knight. When the world is against her, the knight is the only standing with her. When her sanity leaves her, the knight is the one protecting the world from her. A Sorceress' Knight protects the sorceress from the world, and ultimately from herself.  

I found this idea intriguing. Different from the story of a chivalrous knight and a beautiful princess loved by the whole kingdom, you know, the one with dragons and stuffs and always ends with a happy ending; the story of a Sorceress is neither dreamy nor pretty. The Sorceress is not loved by the world. She cannot provide wealth and happiness to the knight. And one day, the blade of the knight might have to pierce her heart to protect her from herself. Yet, despite all odds, despite the status quo, they are loyal to each other. Over the time, the intrigue becomes an obsession. Sorceress and her knight found their way to my writings, my daydreams. Eventually, I set out to find my own sorceress. 

I was hasty. I made many mistakes. And some where along the way, I became disillusioned of the idea, forgot it. After all, the world is banal. People are banal. I have to grow up, as I will never be ...chosen. 

And then I realised one thing. 

Each one of us can be a sorceress, or sorcerer. We are magical in our own ways, and we all have our own demons. One way or another, we have to face the world, and ourselves. And all of us, one way or another, will be called to assume the role of the Sorceress' Knight to someone do important to us. We can't force someone to be our sorceress, just like we can't simply choose our knight. It doesn't work that way. All we can do is listening to what life asks us, and getting ready to stand up to the challenge. 

And when all pieces of puzzle fit together. It will be marvelous.