Poems

Deceptions of Depression

Invisible and alone in a room full of people

Marking every difference between them and I on my skin

Holding more questions in my head than answers

Apathetic pain like a voodoo doll pricked through with a black pin

Pretending to be someone I'm not anymore

Pathetic, continuous fears I drown in

Youth fades into nothing like I am and I know I cannot win

Ice isn't as cold as what they say

Maybe if I change they'll stop

Friends of mine don't see through my mask

I think they're like porcelain dolls less fragile than I; I'm lost

Nevertheless they are my only comfort

Every time with them I managed what I thought was a real smile

Recounting the stories, nothing can give me that anymore

Even now, it's been a while

All the time, I tell myself I'm pretty now

Lying that this of all ways is how I changed

Letting them discriminate against what they've made of me

You know, the pain is numbing, but still strained

Illnesses can not always be fought

When I found a solution that would work for good I forced myself to take

Always forgotten, I'll now be remembered

Napping peacefully so I no longer have to be fake

Telling others everything will be fine will finally be true for me

Truth will relax me from the lies they all bought

Others see me as myself for the first time in years

Killjoys see me as someone untaught
It wouldn't work if I explained things the way I see them

Laughing at my own words for what I would say

Letting them in is no longer a problem

Most things out of my mouth though would sound too cliché

Yelling because I'm free, I think happy thoughts

Smiling for real, though I'm sorry this is typed rather than wrote.

Everyone thinks I've gotten better

Love, the girl from this final note...

Forever.

(P.S. Read the first letter of every line and see if the sentence matches the section)