Existence

Chapter 3: Why am I always having to save you ?

Chapter 3: Why am I always having to save you ?

I had finally made it home. After such a crazy night, I was'nt tired but I told my uncle that I was. He told me we would talk in the morning. I had left him in the kitchen with him stressfully running his fingers through his hair and headed back to my room, where I would probally lay tilll I decide to go get drunk again.

My uncle left me alone and I was fine with that. So I slowly walk up the steps too my room. Once I had reached my door I slip off my heels and run my fingers through my hair before opening my door.

My room was dark. Reds, blacks and whites covered most it. I had a huge queen bed that lay deep into the corner, draped with royal red sheets and a double stuff comforter. I had white satin curtains that block out any light from peeking through. Two of my walls were painted black. There was quotes from songs I like, beautifully painted on. I walk toward my bed and lazily sprawl out across it. I find myself wanting to loose my self again as I lay on my bed thinking. I knew that every time I was alone I would get too anxious, or to tired to even get out of bed.

I thought too much when I was alone.

"Mel, come on dude, he's a real cutie pie "Charlie whispered to me as we walked through the mall, decided which guy we would try and give our numbers too.

"Charlie, you are just crazy and that is it ." I said too her and we bursted out laughing, gaining unwanted stares from strangers. She shushed our laughing and we got in line at a smoothie stand to get something to drink.

"I know I am crazy Mel, but you're my bestfriend, so what does that make you ?" She asked more seriously then the tone we just had. I stared at her blankly. She looked at me, titled her head to the side. I knew she wanted an answer, but how do you reply to something as silly as that ?

"I am the one who keeps you sane, You dummy, " I replied and smiled at her warmheartedly, trying to lighten up the mood.

She frowned and turned to face me.

"I went back to the brdge, last night Mel, I needed to get away for a bit, I was Gonna jump, I swear I was. "

She stared at me with her piercing blue eyes glazed over.

She was so over dramatic. Her father did'nt even live with her any more

"Stop being Redicously Mel,You are strong enough, Just deal with it" I said too her, avoiding what I was actually thinking.She stared at me and opened her mouth to reply.

"Can I help you witha drink Ladies?"The cashier interupted.

She looked at me once more then flashed her perfect smile.

"No, thank you. "She said and walked away from me.

Tears had began to stream down my cheeks, I wipe them and I sit up on my bed.

"Don't think about her Melanie. Please. You can be strong. She is a part of your past now." I whsipered to myself, barely able to breath from the intense memory.

My chest hurt. I ached for the past. I ached for the life I once had. I could actually feel the pain. It burned deep in my heart and stayed with me. No matter who I was with or how much I drank. I felt like I couldnt breath.Tears continued to roll down my cheeks and my eyes burn from it. I start to feel sick to my stomach and soon found myself desparately crawling to the bathroom to throw up. I clean myself up with eyes glazed over. Why at such a random time would I break down like this?

I'm just so weak now.

I mean I almost got raped and did'nt even dare to commit to killing the guy. I had someone do the work for me.