I had been told that everything that falls breaks.
I fell for Jc, and I didn't break. I crumbled.
I guess I should have listened to the people who warned me not to get hurt. Right now I need those people back; these people were my fans.
I set up my camera the way I normally would, mounting it to the tripod. I pull the lights out of the closet and brush the dust off of them. This is it I thought This is where I need to be. Because really, I needed to be in front of the camera. I needed the support that my fans had previously given me because no one else believed inn what I was doing (or currently did). I was now ready to explain myself, this was going to be tough.
"Hey guys!" I said to the camera "I know what you're thinking, 'This isn't the real JennxPenn! She hasn't been on in forever, I'm pretty sure she's dead!' And yes, the past year and a half of my life has been pretty hard; but I'm willing to put that past me. I'm so sorry guys, I know I haven't even been on twitter but I've realized things aren't going to get better if I just sit around feeling sorry for myself, I'm ready to give you guys 110% of my... Everything really." I paused, taking a deep breath and shifted so I could make a transition when I edited this video "But, you guys have to be willing to accept me back into the youtube community! I know I don't really deserve it because I was gone for so long, but I would really appreciate it if you did" I smile to the camera. This was a lot to be doing at once, so I decide to stop filming for a bit and start going onto my social media starting with twitter saying a simple sentence "I'm not dead guys lol". I added the "lol" because this whole thing seemed like some big joke to me.
I'm a joke; but that's okay becasue jokes are funny, right?
I didn't bother reading the responses because I didn't want them to affect the current mood I'm in; in other words, actually feeling okay for once.
I take another deep breath and continue the video "I'm going to be posting videos on here again, so stay tuned for that, and maybe leave some suggestions in the comments becasue I'm going to be reading and responding to some of them after this goes up. Thanks for watching this video, I'll see you guys next week! Bye!"
_______
and with jenn ending her video,
i'm ending this chapter.
I LOVE YOU MY LUCKY STARS
STAY POSITIVE
BYEEE
YOU ARE READING
Lungs // Jc Penny
Fanfiction"It depends on if I'm going to fake a smile when I'm around you, or if you could truly make me happy again." We both knew what was coming. We both knew how hard it was to be happy, but the void in my heart turned into a hole. Something I could final...
