Letting Go

I Stood. You Swayed.

I slid the key in the lock and placed my hand in too of the door knob. I turned the key and then did the same to the door knob. Pushing it open, I walked in and looked around.

The living room was empty and quiet. The kitchen stood empty, but had proof that you were using it this morning. I smiled as I saw your miserable creation in the sink; you threw your omelette thing into the sink.

"Evan? You here?" I called as I sat I your living room. Your frumpy couch was actually quite comfy. I looked around as I waited for you. That's when I found it.

On top of a pile of opened bills a letter sat in an envelope. The envelope was sealed and had my name written on it with cursive hand writing. I smiled at the surprise and picked it up. I flipped it over and pushed the seal up, to find a letter; a letter written in your best hand writing. It read:

"To my dearest Ella,

I knew you would be the first to notice something was wrong with little boy blue. I knew it because I love you Ella. You are my everything, and I will never forget you, please don't forget me.

See, I've grown tired of living and have decided that I am useless to this world. My pain brings my help to those in need.

Remember what I told you? Depression never ends until it ends you. Well, my war is resolved now. It's undecided who has won; depression or me. I chose this for myself, please don't blame yourself because honestly yo I are the best thing has ever happened to me. If only I could live with you in your humble heart.

Ella, you are a beautiful young woman with her whole life in front of her, I don't want to hold you back from what you can become. I'm a ball and chain of pain. You're humorous and intelligent, so I know you know where this is going.

All I can say now is I love you. Not myself, which is why couldn't bare to live with the thoughts anymore.

I love you, take care Ella.

Evan. "

I couldn't sit in shock, I ran to your room and pushed the door open to find you. I fell to the floor screaming

"What have you done?"

I couldn't see straight. My arms were weak, but I forced them up as if trying to grasp a hug from you. You hung from the ceiling. An image that will visit me everyday. I slowly stood up and removed you from the rope and sat on the floor with you in my arms. I cried and yelped for help as you lay lifeless in lap. The last thing I remember was the neighbor pulling me away as they dialled 911.